Let’s send the news to Helen Effin Thomas. I’m sure she’ll take an interest in the story.
Kill them by forcing them to stare it a pinup of her, butt nekkid and lounging invitingly on a couch, with a sign saying “Hey, big boy. I’m you first virgin. 71 to go. Come deflower me.” Keep their eyes open like they did in Clockwork Orange, and then take photos of their head imploding to send home to their village.