I’ll leave the term “malignant” to others with more insight. But he’s for sure a narcissist in my estimation, and I too saw his reaction as an attempt to portray her concerns in a minimal fashion. “Oh, it’s not all that bad now, is it?”. Think of the patronizing attitude something like this originates from.
It was a defensive mechanism, I’ll agree. But, I’ll posture, not one coming from his embarrassment but from his desire to tone the message.
I've known many people like this - particularly in the performing arts. They spend inordinate amounts of time obsessing over their appearance or voice or personal presentation, but they can also be incredibly good friends - the kind that will rush to your aid at 3am when no one else will, because they feel so deeply. They'll... also drive you crazy with their endless worries, but sometimes that's a price you pay for genuinely liking people.
I don't get that sort of "vibe" about Obama at all, and I never have. The self-love is all there, baby, but the empathy... not so much. I think other people are a means to his ends. I'm just guessing here, but Rahm Emmanuel probably has some stories he'd like to tell.