You are not alone. Have faith and work for the good. I am doing the same in my diocese. There is still love in the world. Despair is the weapon of despite. The lord of this world uses it even more than he does terror.
Outstanding post! Bless You for writing this!
Also ,Chuckles,try reading what the Catholic Church ACTUALLY teaches and not judging the whole Church based on grave sinful behavior of people who call themselves Catholic Christians who do NOT follow ACTUAL historical Church teachings that are Anti Abortion Anti homosexual and other grave sin etc...