“Had Virginia stayed in the Union I’m sure Lee would have been quite willing to lead the Union armies. From his words, it sounds like he would have preferred that to what actually did happen.”
Yes, I’m sure he would have, because his ultimate loyalty was to Virginia. But since his loyalty was to a seceding state, Virginia, above all other loyalties, he took up arms to defend her. And that meant fighting the Union.
He had an agonizingly tough choice to make, just as a couple million other Americans had to make at that time. That’s why a civil war is the worst possible thing that can befall a nation and a people.
We can agree 100% about that.
As one who speaks from the North: I have a great admiration for General Lee. He was a man of honor and character. Although he was a slave owner, he did not believe in the institution, and would have rather seen it phased out gradually, so that there would not be secession and war. He promoted the education of his slaves, in order to prepare them for freedom, and a means by which they could be self-supporting. I am convinced that he based his decisions on personal honor, considering the context in which he found himself.
The question of Virginia's secession was out of his hands, but once his state seceded, he saw loyalty to Virginia as his duty. After the surrender at Appomattox, he dissuaded his officers from conducting a guerrilla war. He then spent the last five years of his life in promoting peace and healing between North and South.
General Lee was a fine example of American manhood, and the consummate Southern Gentleman. And this is why I, a Yankee girl, remember him with high esteem on January 19th of every year.