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To: Sherman Logan
Historically a boy became a man by assuming the roles of husband and father.

Which, nowdays, one is encouraged to delay as long as possible (not just by women being told they don't need a man, but by society at large saying "not yet").

Get a degree. Get another degree. Get a job. Nurture a career. Wait until you're thirtysomething. Get a home. Buy. Travel. More. ... by then, the poor schlep is almost old enough to be a grandfather (pushing that maybe, but still!).

Moving into my forties, I'm realizing that husband-and-father IS what, deep down, most males need be for fulfillment. Following society's "not yet" imperative does not satisfy this, leaving him to fill time with undirected amusements and urges - to wit, prolonged adolescence. Yes, he should wait long enough to "discover himself", establish independence, and find Miss Right (not hyphenated with -Now), but he should do so with husband-and-father as a goal, not something drifted into via/despite time-filling amusements & indulgences.

...and to achieve this at a suitable age (about 25, given that he really should get a degree, job, and real estate), he needs to know that there is someone else out there waiting for him to achieve such readiness (instead of merely prolonging teenhood) - lest she give up on finding him and go to another who is ready.

42 posted on 10/20/2009 10:59:27 AM PDT by ctdonath2 (Mr. Obama, I will not join your plantation.)
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To: ctdonath2

I agree.


43 posted on 10/20/2009 11:05:25 AM PDT by Sherman Logan ("The price of freedom is the toleration of imperfections." Thomas Sowell)
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