Posted on 09/07/2009 4:29:13 AM PDT by Kaslin
Millions of Americans who shop at Costco receive the retail giants monthly magazine The Costco Connection. I have to confess however that my copy of the publication usually never makes it past the garage. Not so the recent August issue, which promotes on the cover a Back to School series of essays for parents and children. Since one of the essays promised to take on the issue of bullying, I decided to take a closer look.
Bullies seem to be everywhere these days. From the schoolyard to the political arena thugs young and old have been learning that threats and intimidation are tried and true tactics in the face of frail opposition. The tragic kidnapping, repeated rape, and eighteen-year-long nightmare of young Jaycee Lee Dugard highlights the importance of effectively resisting those whose identities are fashioned by crushing the weak.
Imagine my utter disbelief then when my eyes landed on the advice offered by the two nationally recognized bullying experts interviewed for Costcos story Stop Hassling Me: Breaking the Cycle of Bullying. After getting past a rather offensively staged photograph showing two young white girls taunting an African-American schoolmate, the reader is treated to a series of tips for kids by New York City school psychologist and psychotherapist Izzy Kalman. For kids who find themselves on the wrong end of a bully for example Kalman offers the following suggestion:
(Excerpt) Read more at americanthinker.com ...
given “no hitting” zero tolerance in schools today, kids can just tease mercilessly
and if you punch someone taunting you then you are in trouble
you are instructed to go tell...
it’s really bad, I see how meterosexuals were created
first they hold 75% of white boys back at pre-first and then this shite over and over
my oldest boy has punched folks being mean to him twice and calling him country because he refuses to wigger up and he gets in trouble...they fear him and hide behind the teacher
you should see me in the principal’s office
the culture was so much better when I was a boy
The Chairman and President of Costco are big buck Dem supporters. So this fits.
That's where baseball bats, 2x4s, coin rolls in socks, and pieces of furniture come in...
Paul Kersey for President!
My son was getting picked on a couple of years ago by the “class bully”. Just verbal stuff, but it bothered him a lot. We helped him work out some ideas, but after having him talking to the kid, avoiding the kid, etc. didn’t work we all figured talking to the teacher about it was best. (My son didn’t want to be a “snitch”, but we promised it would be confidential).
The teacher had known something was going on but didn’t think it was all that bad. When she heard our story she was able to put the pieces together of what she had seen - with other kids too. The bully and his parents were brought into a meeting with the teacher and were told if there was one more complaint the bully was out of school (it was a select program).
The kid did fine afterwards, lots of deeper family issues, etc. But - he needed to have it shown to him what behaviour was expected of him, and that there would be serious consequences if that behaviour was not met.
Sometimes the serious consequence is a bloody nose. Other times it is getting kicked out of school. My son and the ex-bully now seek each other out for class projects, etc.
I think I took Kalman’s approach as a kid and I was never bullied. Brief unpleasant encounters once in a great while, but never any persistence to it. I still step in between guys that are huffing and puffing from time to time; stay away from bars and you find most people don’t reall want to fight, I think.
Here’s what he looks like.
That’s a picture of him in the book “Victim-Proof Your School”
http://www.bullies2buddies.com/Victim-Proof-Your-School-Anti-Bullying-Program
"Welcome to Costco, I love you."
the stipulation was that if he didnt have cause for fighting, it was gonna be his a@@...
no probs...
A person would have to go pretty far to convince me that this bearded shrinkster is a conservative.
We must remember that “The Karate Kid” was fantasy.
What lunatic wrote this garbage?! HIT THEM BACK HARDER THAN THEY HIT YOU! They will then leave you alone or get their *sses beat!
“he felt even more pathetic and weak because the bully was able to overpower him so easily. And, naturally, the bully has stepped up his onslaught.”
Well, yeah, the sine qua non of this approach is the assumption that, when you fight back, you deal the bully some serious pain. Even if you then lose the fight.
If the kid that is being bullied cannot do that, then either someone needs to do it on his behalf, or adults need to step in with strong sanctions that also protect the weaker kid from the bully.
I’m proceeding from what & how he presented. If he’s a liberal, he’s a smart one, stealing conservative principles where it suits him.
it’s vexing though..btw ..principal is a peach...very conservative, I prefer not to make her life difficult
when I was a kid and you ran yer mouth you had to cash the check..not now..kids tease him for refusing to wigger up and if he punches them (like he has twice) then he gets in trouble
it sux
they fear him but they know he is neutered a bit now...by rules which simply did not exist in my day, you could only tease folks who did not fight back
women run schools now and they just don’t get that..most anyhow
oh well...I feel sorry for him.
In the News/Activism forum, on a thread titled On Bullying, Costco Disconnects from Reality, Uncle Ike wrote:
If kids hit you and youre not hurt, act like nothing happened. This way you look tough and cool because you dont get upset over nonsense. If they keep hitting or pushing you, ask them calmly, Are you mad at me? If they arent, theyll stop hitting you. If they are angry, theyll tell you why. You can discuss the matter, apologize if appropriate, and they will also stop hitting you.
Obama/Hillary foreign policy, in a nutshell.....
Wow what an astute analogy!
Thanks.
Qx ping.
= = =
Excerpt from article,
‘On a recent Tuesday afternoon I sat down with Professor Foley to get his opinion on both the bullying issue and on the non-violent approach to bullying advocated by Kalman and Coloroso. For those of us with small children Foleys words on this score were refreshing, insightful, and very, very wise.
‘Foley began by telling me that he himself was relentlessly bullied by a hulking man-child while in the seventh grade. I tried everything says Foley, talking to him, ignoring him, evading him, but nothing worked he followed me everywhere. On the bus, the bully would flick Foley behind the ear with his finger and if Foley moved to another seat, the bully followed him and continued the attack.
‘One afternoon Foley decided to walk home, hoping to protect the brand new trumpet his mother had worked long hours to purchase. But the bully caught up with Foley near his house and after a series of taunts and shoves the bully kicked Foleys brand new trumpet case down the road. When Foley reached the scuffed and damaged case he immediately turned around and put everything he had into a wild, windmill roundhouse punch and knocked the bully unconscious and clean off of his feet.
‘Of that day Foley remembers a couple of things: a voice coming from a porch nearby asking Foley if hed like to learn how to control that rage. The voice came from a retired Air Force Colonel and martial arts expert who became Foleys first instructor. The second thing Foley recalls is that the bully never bothered him again. His attitude changed says Foley. He actually started doing his schoolwork.
‘For years parents have deposited both the bullies and the bullied at the entrance to Foleys martial arts academy so he understands the dynamic that animates both sides. Kids who get hit and who dont respond will lose respect for themselves, says Foley. Theyll sneak around, worry day and night, and generally think their lives are worthless. Many of these kids, says Foley, will end up at best with extreme self-esteem issues and at worst with a deep seated vengeance of the kind America witnessed at Columbine High School ten years ago.
‘Foley disputes Kalmans and Colorosos more Gandhiesque approach to bullying by saying that for young children life basically revolves around a rather simple scorecard called fight or flight. In other words, kids who are bullied, much to the dismay of our therapeutic experts, rarely if ever care about reforming the bullies. What they do care about is self-respect.
...
‘Having watched this amazing community organizer at work, a parent can only wonder: wouldnt a campus warrior do as much for our kids in the long run as a campus psychotherapist?’
http://www.americanthinker.com/2009/09/on_bullying_costco_disconnects.html
THANKS THANKS.
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