In my case, I don't think I ever had or could have an ability to "control" drinking short of abstinence. One of my motivations for quitting drinking was that I wanted to quit smoking. There was no way I was going to accomplish that while drinking. One drink would wash away any desire to give up smoking.
I have actually decided that part of my drinking was an attempt to prove to myself that my alcoholic father should have been able to quit. Since that time I have decided that he was haunted by demons that I have never met.
I am always amazed by the stories of the compassion for our parents who battled on so many different levels.
Hope you have a long and successful path