There are "eldercare" lawyers who specialize in protecting inheritance money from being used for long term care. The ads say, "Don't let your hard earned assets be used up for nursing home care. Protect your assets so that your children can enjoy them", or something to that effect.
That galls me. Yeah, that's the spirit. Pass all your assets on to your children, then have unrelated taxpayers foot your bill for long term care. That's just wrong.
As a boomer with living parents, I am expecting nothing from my parents. If they need to use it for their comfort and care in old age, so be it. They've given me FAR more important things than money.
He had them divide their assets equally. Her half was quickly consumed by the care home, after Dad could no longer take care of her. He had earned almost all of their joint assets, but his support of her was limited to about half of their net worth.
He still had enough to provide himself with a meager living for the rest of his life. My brother and I did not have to bankrupt ourselves to pay for about eight years of nursing home care.
I don't know the optimal solution. Perhaps euthanasia? Murder-suicide by the cogent spouse?
If any of you has the ideal solution to this problem, you should speak up.