Dear sir or madam,
the way I was raised...
and the way I have raised my children...
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I was taught to address ALL males as sir and ALL females as ma’am.
This applies to:
my mother, my father, my aunts, and uncles...
my wife, my daughter, and my granddaughter...
my sons and my grandson...
my boss, and my subordinates...
my friends, my acquaintances, shopkeepers, and strangers...
teachers, judges, doctors, police officers...
senators, representatives, and governors...
whites, blacks, reds, and yellows...
preachers, priests, rabbis, and reverends...
old, young, and in between...
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Those titles then become a great equalizer of any class distinction.
One time a boss man told me,
“You really don’t have to call me sir.”
I replied,
“I know I don’t ‘have to’, but it is the way I was raised.”
He probably had an English granny. :-)
I was taught to address ALL males as sir and ALL females as ma’am.
As posted in #57:
"I realize that in the United States that “sir” and “m’am” are merely a form of politeness, but to my granny it evoked memories of rigid class-ism."
I am very respectful of people who do use "sir" and "m'am" because I **know** that it has nothing to do with class ism here in the U.S., and is a form of respect.
We don't teach our children though to use "sir" and "m'am". And....I would probably be like the man above, and would say, "You really don't need to call me 'm'am".