On the other hand, four of my good friends - men who are completely hetero, with strong, long marriages and children - have effeminite characteristics. Two of them are fellow Air Force Reserve colonels.
Colonel, USAFR
This is a very valid point. What most don't realize is there are more effeminate heterosexual men than homosexual. Apparently misinformation and mistaken beliefs (perhaps best defined as old wives' tales) have brainwashed many into believing effeminate behavior implies homosexuality. If somebody isn't sure what is meant by old wives' tales, check this out.
If somebody believes homosexuals are born that way, they are not at all familiar with the science of homosexuality. There is no evidence or research that claims homosexuality is genetic. There is no genetic test, experimental or otherwise that can determine one's sexual orientation.