The only reason this is an issue (in my opinion) is because very few people care for their elderly family members any more and do not understand or want to deal with the issues of aging and dying. When the old folks become a problem most are placed in nursing homes and few family members even visit regularly after that. It is a whole lot easier to make the decision of “letting one die” than it would be if they had a relationship built from caring for them on a daily basis. Those same family members don’t have the hands on care experience to know what is right and what isn’t when their family member is dying.
I was raised to understand that illness, injury, and death were all a part of life. I was not sheltered when pets and later family members were ill, injured, or dying. It was not something to fear- or “take care” of and instead was a natural part of life and accepted that way. I am different that many conservatives in that I do believe in the concept of assisted suicide- on a very limited and case by case basis- just as I would put down a suffering animal if I could not do anything to end the suffering. However, I don’t believe in legalizing assisted suicide or supporting it for one reason- I don’t trust the judgement of most folks to know the rare circumstance when it might possibly be appropriate. Not for me or any of my family and I think it is just a decision left best up to God for that reason alone. There is an issue of evil and some folks are plain evil and what would stop them from being in the position to make that kind of decision? Most people are just not epuipped to make that decision because issues of convenience and money can not be kept out of the equation and I know legalizing the right to die is a slippery slope to an obligation to die.
I have cared for elderly family up until their death- my mother died of breast cancer that went through her chest wall and became lung cancer- according to her doctor a very painful way to die. Yet her doctor (God bless him) was willing to prescribe enough pain killer in large amounts and she did not suffer. She was not always comfortable- but never suffered. I was honored to spend her last days and weeks caring for her, and we talked of many things- but mostly family history that I would never have known if I had not cared for her then. There were things she had forgotten about her childhood and family that somehow came back to her clearly- as if she was reliving them and I learned so many things about her during that stage. I wouldn’t trade the experience for anything in the world. I had similiar experience with my dad who died from emphasema.
If more people were not sheltered from the dying process as they are in modern society this would not be as big of an issue as it is today. I think more would understand that quality of life is different depending on circumstances and what we are willing or able to handle will change with our life stages. It is easy for a 20 year old to say- “I would never want to live like that” about many conditions that we would be more than happy to endure at the end stage of life. Perspective is everything and the problem is lack of perspective when talking about quality of life.
That’s a very insightful post. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experiences with us.
I very much agree. I was not raised in any religion, but with a belief in God & a life beyond. I do not want to end my life in terrible pain or subject my family to onerous medical bills when there really is no hope. I reserve the right to make my OWN choice. I do not believe anyone has the right to make the choice for another.