The Wallet -The Ticket-The Finale:
The Wallet
[George's car]
GEORGE: So, I'm uh, I'm afraid we're going to have to pass.
SUSAN: You're passing?
GEORGE: Well, it's . . . much too low.
SUSAN: Are you and Jerry in complete agreement on this?
GEORGE: Ah, yeah, . . . I believe I can speak for the both of us on this.
SUSAN: Because you know, because this is your first show this is a pretty standard deal.
GEORGE: Standard?
SUSAN: Yeah.
GEORGE: Is Ted Danson's deal standard?
SUSAN: Ted Danson?
GEORGE: You know, the guy from Cheers.
SUSAN: Yeah, I know who he is. (laughs) You're not Ted Danson.
GEORGE: I didn't say I was Ted Danson.
SUSAN: All right, I'll tell Russell tomorrow.
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The Ticket
George: What?
Jerry: NBC! They wanna have another meeting about the idea.
George: They wanna have another meeting? They wanna buy it?! They wanna but it?! Oh! I tell you! We're gonna be rich!! What are we gonna get for this? Fifty, sixty thousand?
Jerry: I don't know about sixty.
George: Oh, it's gotta be fifty! Hee hee! You know how much Ted Danson makes, huh?
Jerry: Ted Danson! Now, how are you comparing us to Ted Danson?
George: I didn't say 'We're Ted Danson.'
Jerry: Yes, you did. You said 'We're Ted Danson'!
George: Oh!
Jerry: You know, I think he wears a piece.
George: Yeah, don't worry. He can afford it.
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The Finale
[Our heroes enter the plane]
Jerry: Not bad.
Elaine: Wow!
Kramer: The only way to fly.
George: This is it?
[After take-off, the group chit-chats]
George: I'm sorry - I have to say, I'm a little
disappointed, I thought it would be a lot nicer.
Jerry: You're complaining about a private jet?
George: You think this is the plane that Ted Danson gets?
Jerry: Ted Danson is not even on the network anymore.
George: Still, I bet when they gave him a plane, it was a lot nicer than this one.
Elaine: Will you shut up? You are ruining the whole trip.
George: This is a real piece of junk. I don't even feel safe on this thing. I have a good mind to write a letter toMr. Kimbrough.
Jerry: You're not writing any letters!
[Outside the plane]
Captain: Well, again, sorry about that little mishap. But once you get everything checked out there shouldn't be anymore problems.
Jerry: Where are we?
Captain: Latham, Massachusetts. Why don't you take a cab into town, get yourself something to eat. I got your beeper number - I'll beep you as soon as we're ready.
Jerry: Okay.
Elaine: Okay.
Jerry: We'll see you later.
[In front of a store, in Latham, Massachusetts]
Elaine: Well, what are we going to do about Paris? I mean are we actually going to get back on this plane?
Jerry: I say we go back to New York, and take a regular flight.
George: I'm not getting on a regular plane now - I'm all psyched up to go on a private jet. No way I'm getting on a regular plane.
Elaine: Well, I'm sure that they would fly us first class.
George: First class doesn't make it anymore. Now you get on the phone with Kimbrough, tell him what happened and tell him to get another plane down here, but this time, the good one - the Ted Danson plane.
Jerry: Alright, I'll feel him out.
George: Yeah, just tell him to hurry it up.
Stranger: Nice day.
Jerry: Another one?
[A carjacking takes place in front of the group]
Don't tell me -- it's going to include gay marriages, too. Ugh!
There will be mass shrinkage of ratings after the initial couple of shows.
I got to see Jerry in concert this past January (I got the tix for a Christmas gift). He was at the Benedum in Pittsburgh. AWESOME!!! I laughed so hard. He is still in top form.
Nah. How about this. He manages a circus....