Times have changed. If your soldiers came down here, they would likely be unable to get a manicure or peticure for weeks or months. They would march 20 about miles without coming across a sushi bar and surrender.
At least our soldiers would make it down there. Yours would be so dumb that they'd try to come north and end up falling into the Atlantic Ocean . . . that is, if they could make it by the assorted piles of junk rusting in their front yards, or if they could pry themselves off their sisters or their cousins for the duration.
And it's "pedicure," by the way.