This happened on a flight ready to depart for Detroit .
Jack was sitting when a guy took the seat beside him. The guy was an emotional wreck, pale, hands shaking, moaning in fear. “What’s the matter?” Jack asked.
“I’ve been transferred to Detroit , there’s crazy people there. They have a lot of shootings, gangs, race riots, drugs, poor public schools, and the highest crime rate.”
Jack replied, “I’ve lived in Detroit all my life. It’s not as bad as the media says. Find a nice home, go to work, mind your own business and enroll your kids in a nice private school. It’s as safe a place as anywhere in the world.”
The guy finally relaxed and said, “Thank you. I’ve been worried to death, but if you live there and say it’s OK, I’ll take your word for it. By the way, what do you do for a living?”
“Me?” said Jack. “I’m a tail gunner on a Budweiser truck.”
Chuckle. Thanks for the giggle.
Iraqi Hockey Player
The Detroit Red Wings foreign scout flies to Baghdad to watch
a young Iraqi play hockey in the new American sponsored league,
and is suitably impressed and arranges for him
to come over to the US. Ken Holland
signs him to a one year contract and
the kid joins the team for the preseason.
Two weeks later the Wings are down 4-0 to the Blackhawks
with only 10 minutes left. Mike Babcock gives the young Iraqi
the nod and he goes in.
The kid is a sensation - scores 5 goals in 10 minutes
and wins the game for the Wings! The fans are delighted,
the players and coaches are delighted,
and the media love the new star.
When the player comes off the ice he phones his mom:
“Hello mom, guess what?”
“I played for 10 minutes today, we were 4-0 down,
but I scored 5 goals and we won. Everybody
loves me, the fans, the media, they all love me.”
“Wonderful,” says his mom, “Let me tell you about my day.
Your father got shot in the street and robbed, your sister
and I were ambushed, raped and beaten, and your
brother has joined a gang of looters, and all
while you were having such great time!”
The young Iraqi is very upset.
“What can I say mom? I’m so sorry.”
“Sorry? You’re Sorry?!!” says his mom,
“It’s your fault we moved to
DETROIT in the first place!”