Yes, I can imagine how that would suck the mood right out. I always wanted to stay home with my daughter, I think it's best for the children, but had to go to work when she was under six months old.
My husband couldn't understand that, after working ten hours, cooking dinner, looking after our daughters needs and preparing for the next day, I was done. There was no more. Elvis had left the building. After about thirty years of him telling me how inadequate I was at "taking care of us" I let him have it. I pointed out to him that his only job was to financially support his family and I had to help him do that. He had never been help around the house, not even with yard work. I told him if the house wasn't clean enough for him, clean it. It was the last time he every said anything about the house being dirty or not getting sex any time he wanted. Years later, I pointed out to him how willing he was to live in a dirty house when he had to clean it. He, by the way, has only worked one day a week over the last five and a half years.
This is why,at the beginning of our marriage, we decided that I would work and she would be at home, and our standard of living would be determined by what I made. It works out better this way.
and you work and he refuses to help clean up?
unless he is sick, you have a problem dear....hell, any man that would sit home and let his woman work for him is a breed I fail to recognize anyhow
nothing personal