Teacher forces teens to question being 'straight'

Teacher forces teens to question being 'straight' 'Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may grow out of?' December 02, 2008

The mother of a Wisconsin teenager was stunned when her high school senior brought home a questionnaire assigned by his English teacher that asked, among several provocative questions, "Is it possible that your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex?"

The mother, Marilyn Hanson, reviewed the questionnaire and thought it completely inappropriate for any class, but especially for a required English class, where, Hanson told WND, "They should be taught to read and write and prepare for college."

"I really believe this was outright indoctrination to the homosexual viewpoint," Hanson said. "I could see this being discussed in a debate class, where both sides were presented. But the other side was not presented."

Hanson told WND, "I think they're trying to shove [homosexuality] down our throats."

Hanson's son, Alex, originally thought he was required to complete the questionnaire for the next day's class. He was struggling, however, to answer the following questions:

Is it possible that your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex?

Do your parents know that you are straight? Do your friends and/or roommate(s) know? How did they react?

* What do you think caused your heterosexuality?

If it wasn’t an intelligent design creating a biological urge for the opposite sex to ensure procreation and thus propagation of the species, then genetics and natural selection pretty much ensured it.

When I think on it, that last would pretty much ensure the vast majority of humans would be heterosexual. For instance, about the only way non-heterosexual inclinations could be carried forward genetically would be for a cultural bias to exist against them, encouraging most to hide their inner urges and adapt to expectations around them and spread their seed more fruitfully.

Were that to change, one would expect an environment more open to non-heterosexual behavior to decimate the number of alleles population-wide carrying a weak or anti-heterosexual trait being passed on. It would then follow that within a few generations the number not conforming to typical sexual behavior would be drastically culled.

* When did you decide you were heterosexual?

I didn’t—and it was awfully inconvenient when it happened. Imagine trying to listen to a geranium-sniffing hippy seventh-grade science teacher whilst sitting behind Debbie Schlinkert in those short raggedy denim cutoffs bending down to get into her backpack five times per period. The only thing I learned about biology that year was that I damn well couldn’t get up to sharpen my pencil all hour.

* Could it be that your heterosexuality is just a phase?

It certainly was, the last phase of my sexual development as a human male.

* To whom have you disclosed your heterosexuality? How did they react?

I don’t really ‘disclose’ it directly at all. Perhaps people can tell due to my interest in the features of various females; and privately with close friends I’ll reveal the things I’d like to do with certain women given the opportunity, but it would be pretty damn weird for me to me to exclaim to all and sundry that I’m heterosexual.

* If you have never slept with someone of the same gender, then how do you know you wouldn’t prefer it?

I’ve slept with other males countless times in my life, sometimes in the same bed or tent—especially as a boy on sleep overs and camp outs. However I’ve never had sex with them because they don’t look anything like Debbie Schlinkert and thus certain necessary temporary physiological changes didn’t/wouldn’t occur.

* Is it likely that you just haven’t met the right same gender partner yet?

No, like the grand majority of human males I have no interest in other males sexually and the thought of having sex with one repulses me. Without ever tasting it, I am repulsed by the thought of eating fecal mater as well. Perhaps an aversion to same-sex couplings is genetically inborn, at least among males?

* Why do you flaunt your lifestyle with wedding rings, photos at work and talk of your heterosexual escapades?

It’s not ‘flaunting,’ it’s merely the byproduct of typical human development.

* Your heterosexuality doesn’t offend me as long as you don’t try to come on to me, but why do so many heterosexuals try to seduce others to their orientation?

It’s an inherent biological urge for males to woo females. Males being un- or less-accepting of males having sex with other males could reflect a genetic aversion as its cross-cultural ubiquitous nature would suggest.

* Considering the battering, abuse and divorce rate associated with heterosexual coupling, why would you want to enter into that kind of relationship?

To procreate and have a full life, whatever the odds.

* Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?

To propagate the species and ensure our paternity.

>> * What do you think caused your heterosexuality?

I'm a mammal. All mammals reproduce heterosexually.

>> * When did you decide you were heterosexual?

As soon as I became a mammal.

>> * Could it be that your heterosexuality is just a phase?

Mammals have reproduced heterosexually since they evolved during the Triassic period, about 225 million years ago.

Is 225 million years a "phase"?

>> * If you have never slept with someone of the same gender, then how do you know you wouldn't prefer it?

I've never eaten feces either. The thought of doing so provokes an instinctive revulsion - as does the thought of sleeping with someone of the same gender.

>> * Is it likely that you just haven't met the right same gender partner yet?

No. I'm a mammal. Mammals reproduce heterosexually.

>> * Why do you flaunt your lifestyle with wedding rings,
>>photos at work and talk of your heterosexual escapades?

I'm a mammal. Mammals reproduce heterosexually.

Should I also remove all my hair and cool my blood to hide the fact that I am a mammal?

>> * Considering the battering, abuse and divorce rate associated with heterosexual coupling,

I believe you'll find the incidence of the aforementioned offenses to be at least as high among homosexuals.

>>why would you want to enter into that kind of relationship?

I'm a mammal. Mammals reproduce heterosexually.

>> * Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?

Because we're mammals. And most reproductively fit mammals instinctively know that part A goes into part B and not part P; and we don't want our resources appropriated by non reproductively fit individuals who lack this instinctive knowledge.

THERE ARE TIMES I WISH I WAS STILL IN HIGH SCHOOL

* What do you think caused your heterosexuality?

Being Made in the image of God was a large factor in it. Being raised by decent loving parents also had something to do with it. Being protected from idiotic propaganda until I was old enough to see it for the blather it is was the third factor.

* When and how did you decide you were a heterosexual?

About the same time I came to the conclusion I had to obey the law of gravity and had to breathe oxygen, rather than water.

* Is it possible that your heterosexuality is just a phase you may grow out of?

There are all types of perversions that I could grow into, should I become that morally twisted.

* Is it possible that your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex?

It is a theoretical possibility. However, it is much more likely that it comes from a moral revulsion for a perverted moral twistedness.

* Do your parents know that you are straight? Do your friends and/or roommate(s) know? How did they react?

My parents haven't a clue. I have to sneak around to rid myself of the glam make-up and dresses they insist that I wear. My roomates think I am an alien axe murderer, so the homosexual bit is way way down on their list of issues with me.

* Why do you insist on flaunting your heterosexuality? Can't you just be who you are and keep it quiet?

I dunno. I have had these irrational urges ever since I took the first mindless survey like this one. Watching those ACT-UP marches on TV just pushed me right over the top.

* Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their lifestyles?

It is part of a desire to see evil banished from the universe.

* A disproportionate majority of child molesters are heterosexual. So you consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers?

A disproportionate majority of PEOPLE are heterosexual. However a disproportionate majority of homosexuals have other perversions, so I think I will take my chances with the heteros.

* With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?

Part of it is the constant assault on traditional morality by crusading sexual libertines. The rest of it is the raw selfishness and inisistence that personal preference trumps all ancient moral taboos.

* Statistics show that lesbians have the lowest incidence of sexually transmitted diseases. Is it really safe for a woman to maintain a heterosexual lifestyle and run the risk of disease and pregnancy?

Only if she keeps her legs crossed. Of course, this option is ridiculous. so I guess she should just copulate with whatever man, woman or beast comes next. Just be sure it is "safe."

* Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual?

Considering that the entire population of the planet could stand at double arms intervals and not fill up the state of Texas, I suppose the human race will survive the same way it has survived up to now.

* Would you want your child to be heterosexual, knowing the problems that s/he would face?

Of course not! Far better to go into a lifestyle where the average male has at least 25 sexual partners, the rates of STDs are through the roof, and that one can go through life with a compulsive urge to tell everyone else about your sexual life when we could frankly, care less.

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