Posted on 10/30/2008 1:47:56 PM PDT by dighton
By T. Coddington Van Voorhees VII
Columnist, The National Topsider
Membership Chairman, The Newport Club
When my late father T. Coddington Van Voorhees VI founded the iconoclastic conservative journal National Topsider in 1948, he famously declared that “Now is the time for all good conservative helmsmen to hoist the mizzen, pour the cocktails, and steer this damned schooner hard starboard.” In the 60 years since he first uttered it after one-too-many Cosmopolitans at one of Pamela Harriman’s notorious foreign policy black tie balls, father’s pithy bon mot has served as a rallying cry for conservatives from Greenwich to Chevy Chase. Today, I say it’s time for we conservatives to once again grab the rigging and set sail with the flotilla of the true conservative in this race: Barack Obama.
Trust me, I haven’t taken this tack lightly. No Van Voorhees has supported an avowed socialist since great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandpapa Cragmont Van Voorhees lent Peter Minuet $24 and a sack of wampum to swing a subprime mortgage on Manhattan Island. Old dad himself often recounted how, as a lad, he would command the family chauffeur Carleton to drive the Duesenberg down to the Times Square Trans-Lux so he could hiss Roosevelt. But I’ve taken a good measure of this Obama fellow, and I must say I like the cut of the man’s jib.
Pinging the Four Hundred.
Beautiful satire.
I’m confused.
As a general rule, anyone who uses more than 3 names, I find hard to take serious.
Also, anyone who dosen’t use all three they have...
Even more so if they sound, well, Muslim.
Funny satire. Good find.
Oh my goodness, don’t know what to make of this, am getting dizzy, must sit down.
Satire? Ok, I’m no longer confused.
Now I can laugh.
Speaking as someone who actually owns and uses several jibs, I definitely don’t like Zero’s.
Excellent post. Stout fellow!
” reported the growing dismay of the Continental Right over Palin’s embarrassing enthusiasm for childbirth and Israel. “
What ho!
Although I would love to be invited to the White House for mooseburgers and snow machine races through the Rose Garden.
Biff and Muffy gave it two trust-funds up!
The cut of Obama’s jib is that he is a sail in whatever wind that blows if he thinks it’s going to win the race. That’s hardly a substitute for a skilled hand at the helm when sailing through a war and rough economic waters.
Hysterical stuff. Very cutting.
Tongue in cheek? This fellow swallowed the damn thing! Hilarious!!
Oh man, Iowahawk is the king of blog comedy! lad I had swallowed my coffee before I read that!
Hilarious! More please!
This guy is a master.
The direct target is Christopher Buckley, William F. Buckley’s son who endorsed Obama (in part because he thought Palin was a twit) and was promptly booted from the staff of National Review.
I can’t decide which one is better, this piece or the recent “I Am Bill”:
http://iowahawk.typepad.com/iowahawk/2008/10/i-am-bill.html
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