Posted on 09/24/2008 8:10:35 AM PDT by NoControllingLegalAuthority
My fellow Americans,
Your urgent attention is needed for an emergency bail-out to avoid a financial melt-down.
I am here at the Casino on the Indian Reservation and I am now facing a perfect storm of credit risk and complete lack of confidence in the ability to repay a multitude of obligations.
This crisis has grown quickly and with little warning and the situation is indeed dire.
Who knew playing a conservative game like roulette, betting on just red, would result in such unforeseen, widespread financial catastrophe?
The roulette settlement was just the final stroke following the blackjack dealer hitting on seventeen and winning the entire pot!
Earlier, a terrible and unexpected demand upon credit followed what had been a long and successful run of hot dice suddenly having turned cold.
Without your immediate financial assistance, this problem will reach far beyond a simple setback.
Marital confidence is in danger of being completely lost and this situation threatens auto finance and mortgage paybacks.
The problem is very complex and is difficult to explain in detail. Suffice to say, you can trust me that everything that could be done has been done.
It is now at a critical stage where only a massive investment by you, my fellow Americans, can avoid an unthinkable crash.
There are no good options here but nobody wants to see a repeat of the Great Depression suffered by our elders.
I know you will do the right thing to restore the faith of the creditors awaiting your action.
Sincerely,
Randy, your fellow citizen.
Hugh!
All you wagers belong to us.
Paulson is borrowing the money and flying out soon. Says he’ll have to take some risks but he shoulkd have you in the black soon....no guarantee though.
Rut-ro! We’re doomed, DOOMED! Save NCLA today!
In my case, I watched a lot of late night television and was misled about the ease of becoming a real estate millionaire.
Unscrupulous lenders took advantage of me by giving me mortgages no money down.
Then, through no fault of my own the real estate market collapsed leaving me with ten homes an no one to flip them to.
Seeing as I'm a cashier at a drug store and make $8.50 an hour, I have no hope of paying back all the money my homes lost in the real estate adjustment.
Clearly, this is everyone's fault but my own, and the Gubmint should come to the rescue. They've got lots of money.
Owl_Eagle
”You know, I'm going to start thanking
the woman who cleans the restroom in
the building I work in. I'm going to start
thinking of her as a human being”
Help is on it’s way, I’ve been in e-mail corespndence with this rich dude in Nigeria ..... ;-)
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.