Posted on 09/14/2008 10:29:07 AM PDT by RogerFGay
A women's group has declared today National Men's Day – to show them they are needed and appreciated."It is not about bashing men, it's not about making them look bad, it's not about labelling them as losers and dead beats or anything like that," said Margaret Giloth, the President of women's group Phenomenal Women.
"It's about embracing one another and saying let's work this out together, we need each other."
Today's event, which will see men speaking, telling stories, singing and dancing, will also feature guest speakers Dr. Michael E. Conner, who will discuss the importance of fathers in the community, and Dr. Anderson J. Franklin, who will discuss men in their relationships and their dreams.
National Men's Day was the brainchild of Ms. Giloth, who has worked with dozens of women over the past five years and seen them heal from wounds in their lives. Men on the Island, however, don't seem to have, or take advantage of, those same positive outlets.
She said: "I was reflecting on the situation of men in Bermuda and if they fall into troubles or whatever, there seems to be so little outlet for them to be recovered or restored.
"So I said there has got to be something that we as a community can do; and it will take us as a community. It is not just one programme or one church group or one person, it takes everyone in the community to surround this individual with a lot of love and a lot of physical support, whether it's the family, the employers, the outreach programme. It really takes all of us."
Many of the issues plaguing the Island today, such as absent fathers or broken male and female relationships, need to be looked at before healing can occur, added Ms. Giloth.
"The issue of absent fathers in Bermuda is such a cause of concern for me because I see it is so prolific here," she said.
"I truly believe that it is one of the root causes of later troubles in life and we see it manifested in a lot of the social ills that are plaguing Bermuda."
"We need to get to the bottom of it. It requires people facing the truth, and being courageous enough to step up and do something about it. That may start with a simple 'I am sorry', 'I embrace you', 'I claim you', 'I love you'. Those are steps towards healing and I believe the healing has to occur in each individual in order for the community to recover."
She admits people are always interested to know why a woman's group is hosting a Men's Day event, however, she considers it a natural progression.
"Women are nurturers and caregivers and on one end of the spectrum we have been hurt by men, we have struggles with men, we have been left in the lurch a lot by men," she said.
"So the women in our support groups are getting healed from those wounds and so it is just a natural process of growth for us to be able to reach the men.
"We need to partner with them in the healing process. This is not just a one sided affair, that's where National Men's Day has been spawned by women from the love perspective."
Though the event is intended for men on the Island, Ms. Giloth has seen woman get involved to assist the more apprehensive men.
"It's amazing how many women have called or e-mailed me and said 'I really would like the father of my children to be there' can you send me some information. And it is through the women that we are making the most inroads in getting the men there.
"Women are an incredible force and I don't want men to see us as overbearing and power hungry. We are just striving to make our men feel the love that we have for them and get it back through the respect that we deserve.
"We want to partner better with men, we want women to be in healthier relationships and men in better relationships as well."
The event will take place today from 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. at Bernard Park and everyone in the community is welcome to attend. After the event, the Phenomenal Women is hoping to start a weekly men's support group and perhaps even make the National Men's Day an annual celebration.
Well - I’m not exactly sure how things are in Burmuda, except that I suspect that men and women go through the same kinds of experiences and emotions as everywhere else. Anyways - I easily understand your comment in the context of the good ole US of A (and the pork-barrel funding driving Congress to make it as it is).
Maybe it’s just a good reason to partay and who knows how lucky the men will be who show up.
You said: “Most family break-up doesn’t happen became men “abandon” their families. 75-80% or some such divorces are initiated by women. Overwhelmingly, men are abandoned - not the other way around.”
My response: I didn’t mean to insinuate that man are more likely to leave their families at all. I just wanted to point out how terribly important men are to their families.
“So the women in our support groups are getting healed from those wounds and so it is just a natural process of growth for us to be able to reach the men.”
Notice how they try to have it both ways. This initiative isn’t about bashing men, the women say, but the spokeswoman can’t stop herself from framing the problem as the fault of men.
Personally, I’m not going to help some witch mitigate her losses just because she’s become smart enough to conceal her anti-male outlook long enough to try to snare someone to help her with her belated discovery that she has no life for herself on her own.
I got news: all those years of the sisterhood high-fiving as men were arrested on a woman’s say-so, denied visitation rights, barred from their own homes, and forced to pay crippling child support and spouse support have come home to roost. We remember when theatres-full of women cheered during “Thelma and Louise”.
Go. To. Hell. The one you made for yourselves.
"It is not about bashing men, it's not about making them look bad, it's not about labelling them as losers and dead beats or anything like that," said Margaret Giloth, the President of women's group Phenomenal Women... Many of the issues plaguing the Island today, such as absent fathers or broken male and female relationships, need to be looked at before healing can occur, added Ms. Giloth. "The issue of absent fathers in Bermuda is such a cause of concern for me because I see it is so prolific here," she said. "I truly believe that it is one of the root causes of later troubles in life and we see it manifested in a lot of the social ills that are plaguing Bermuda." "We need to get to the bottom of it. It requires people facing the truth, and being courageous enough to step up and do something about it. That may start with a simple 'I am sorry', 'I embrace you', 'I claim you', 'I love you'. Those are steps towards healing and I believe the healing has to occur in each individual in order for the community to recover... Women are nurturers and caregivers and on one end of the spectrum we have been hurt by men, we have struggles with men, we have been left in the lurch a lot by men," she said... "We need to partner with them in the healing process. This is not just a one sided affair, that's where National Men's Day has been spawned by women from the love perspective... Women are an incredible force and I don't want men to see us as overbearing and power hungry. We are just striving to make our men feel the love that we have for them and get it back through the respect that we deserve."It's not that our organization needs money, and lots of it, soon, no, not at all."
OK thanks. I appreciate the clarification. That word “abandon” slipped into the common way of explaining these things as the result of a very large and very intentional propaganda campaign. We just have to work at getting people out of the habit of saying men or fathers “abandon” their families.
You can’t always get what you want
But if you try sometime
You just might find
You get what you need...
The Rolling Stones
That's exactly what I've been saying.
“Which demonstrates once again how women really don’t understand men. Men would prefer that the women show them a NIGHT of appreciation.”
Yes and thank you for the confirmation, I always found this form of ‘communication’ much more persuasive when pursuing a goal than clubbing my man over the head ;^)
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