Posted on 07/29/2008 2:51:24 PM PDT by Popman
For most of the year, it is the duty of the press to scour the known universe looking for ways to ruin your day. The more fear, guilt or angst a news story induces, the better. But with August upon us, perhaps youre in the mood for a break, so Ive rounded up a list of 10 things not to worry about on your vacation.
1. Killer hot dogs
2. Your cars planet-destroying A/C
3. Forbidden fruits from afar
4. Carcinogenic cellphones
5. Evil plastic bags
6. Toxic plastic bottles
7. Deadly sharks
8. The Arctics missing ice
9. The universes missing mass
10. Unmarked wormholes
(Excerpt) Read more at nytimes.com ...
The socialist-dominated Congress must be getting ready to pass reams of oppressive legislation protecting us from all of these horrors of life. The NYT must be running interference for them -— (chuckle) -—
"Within thirty years, we will have the technological means to create superhuman intelligence. Shortly after, the human era will be ended."
Telling the truth at the NYT will get you fired
This guy better brush up his resume'
Where did the missing ice come back from, since it was missing last year?
(Did the missing no-longer-black hole wormholes spit it back out?)
I'm sure the unwashed masses are a lot more interested in the technological means to create superhuman intelligence babes
I was looking forward to falling in an unmarked wormhole!
A new ice age.
Saccharine causing cancer.
DDT wiping out birds (instead we have malaria wiping out populations).
Clackers
Jarts
Dangerous playground equipment
Corvairs
Pintos
Killer asteroids (maybe killer assteroids, yes)
EM emissions from your CRT
DC-10s
AIDs pandemic among heterosexuals
Disco
Eggs
Avocados
Bacon (mmmmmmm Bacon!)
Nuclear power
Concealed carry
Al Gore must know but probably isn't telling us. < /s>
You know, more arctic ice makes it tough to sell his carbon credits or pick up any additional Oscars !
Two of the most dangerous things on the planet !
Way more dangerous than that unmarked wormhole
bump
Are there real marked wormholes?
You make one with a Stargate.
LOL! Good list. Don’t forget Y2K
Can you get one from Walmart or Amazon.com?
A wormhole would let me get more sack time before work. I could also get home for lunch instead of eating the crap at the company cafeteria.
They’re very big, wouldn’t fit in your office.
Radon Gas and Granite Countertops
They got pimped out by the plastic counter top guys.
Ewwwwh, what whores, how do I get these whores out of my face, I mean it , "I had all I can take", wait, that's not it, somebody help me with the quote I'm lookin' for?
Bummer.... No wormholes... no flying cars.... It’s a good thing I got my cloaking device from eBay before they were all gone.
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