No, your god, doesn’t exist. Well maybe in your mind. But in reality, your god doesn’t exist. There is only one true God and he loves everybody. Your god is some spiteful, insecure thing.
Not really. We all deserve His judgment, but He has extended His grace to those that will come to him through the atoning work of his son. None of us deserve his love merely by being human. Our nature will always strive against His. God's love is extended to all, but his salvation is not.