Posted on 06/03/2008 12:00:59 PM PDT by the_devils_advocate_666
When Lylah Rose Goldwater visits Shayne Pitts in prison, she can't bring herself to shake his hand, the one that held the gun that killed her daughter 17 years ago.
"There seems to be a connection between that handshake and my daughter's death," she said. "One of those emotional barriers I have yet to overcome, if ever."
But Goldwater has overcome her hatred of Pitts, 35, who is serving a 40-year to life sentence for the killing of 19-year-old Melody Derosia-Waters in Hopkinton. The mother who once sat in her car outside a courthouse and aimed a gun at Pitts during his trial now supports his recent pardon request and is co-writing a book with him about her daughter.
"My emotional healing is in this book," she said.
Pitts and Derosia-Waters had only known each other for about a month before the teen was killed. Derosia-Waters was pregnant; Pitts says she never told him he was the father, but Goldwater said her daughter identified him as such.
On the day of the murder, the two were driving around so Derosia-Waters could say goodbye to friends before leaving for West Virginia, where she planned to enter drug rehab. Pitts says the killing wasn't intentional and that he doesn't remember all the details. He believes someone slipped him some drugs.
"Toward the end of that, I started feeling real sick, starting to get cramps and cold sweats, "he said.
In a statement to the police after his arrest, Pitts said he felt like an "animal." He took out a pistol, first placed it in his mouth and then turned the pistol on his girlfriend.
Pitts blames drugs for much of his troubles and hopes Goldwater's book "can show some of the pitfalls and paths" drug use can lead to for people. He will be eligible for parole in 2032, but Goldwater recently delivered his request for a pardon to state authorities.
Goldwater contacted Pitts in 2006 through the state's Victim-Offender Dialogue Program. After several meetings, she began feeling that his version of what happened seemed less evil than what was portrayed during his trial.
"It took many, many months getting to the point of feeling an entire forgiveness," she said. "I would hope it gives him some sense of peace."
It sounds like she had those thoughts as well.
"The mother who once sat in her car outside a courthouse and aimed a gun at Pitts"
This Goldwater person is a narcissist of the lowest order. It's not just about you Ms. Goldwater, it's about protecting society from this idiot so he can't kill somebody else's daughter.
I found it odd that mom’s last name is Goldwater while her daughter’s name is Derosia-Waters. What’s up with that?
Two girls I was close friends with back around 1986 were brutally murdered in Austin Texas by Jonathan Wayne Nobles. One of the mothers just had to get to know the guy and would visit him often. They finally executed the scum.
I guess it’s some sort of strange bond some mothers have with the person who took their child’s life. The mother gives life, and this other person took that life.
I don’t get it.
Somehow I missed that. It does seem rather odd.
She’s a better person than I am, unless she is setting him up to kill him when he gets out or at least screw him out of his take of the book royalties...
Took me 30 years to forgive a guy for slighting me that didn't even mean chit.
I pray that I never find myself in this position. Were I to be in such a position, I might, after a very very long time, be able to forgive the individual depending upon the exact circumstances. However, being able to forgive someone like this does not mean you should then work to get that person released from his sentence. He still needs to be held accountable, and society should be protected from him.
“I’ve had a few arguments with people, but I never carry a grudge. You know why? While you’re carrying a grudge, they’re out dancing.”
— Buddy Hackett
I could not forgive, and I would petition the pardon/parole board to keep him in jail so that he could remain protected from my wrath.
Maybe it’s just that some people are pathetically weak and stupid, selfish and self centered. Get to know the person who brutally murdered your daughter? These women are idiots. They are unable to distinguish between something real in their own daughter versus a crazy “relationship” with their child’s killer.
I would want to forgive, but I know gut instinct is revenge.
Holding hate and anger only punishes one person, yourself. The rest of the world moves on, you stagnate and fester in your hate. You can’t change what happened, to move on with life you have to forgive and let go.
But Lord knows that path ain’t easy.
Irish Alzheimer’s - you forget everything except the grudges.
Forgiving him is one thing, and a personal choice for her, but trying to get him out of prison so he can murder somebody else’s daughter is not what this confused woman should be doing. Is she even conscious of the fact that this man also murdered her grandchild?
“I don’t think I could forgive.”
I probably could, once he was planted in the ground.
The family that slays together stays together.
I guess
It's a mental substitution gesture. The hatred inside that hurts a lot, is assuaged by the belief of the forgiver that he or she has done something of a higher nature. The pain that occupied their minds for so long, is substituted by the thought of their act of forgiving. Sort of like the Stockholm Syndrome, since in these peoples' minds, revenge is not an option as they don't want to get into trouble themselves... being a hostage to painful loss.
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