If I lived without thinking there is right and wrong, a God who can send me to hell at various degrees, life is precious, nothing matters but me, etc. I would probably do just what she did.
What seemed like a good idea at the time (and her defense of it) can later become a haunting nightmare.
Nurse friend works with older patients——some talk about nothing but their abortions and babble on and on regretfully about the babies they would have had.
Their nightmares must be hideous.