New DP:
1. Phyllis Diller
2. Jo Stafford
3. Mitch Miller
4. Fidel Castro
5. Patrick Swazye
6. Kirk Douglas
7. Farrah Fawcett
8. Dom DiMaggio
9. Nancy Reagan
10. Ryan O’Neal
11. Paul Newman
12. Britney Spears
13. Elizabeth Taylor
14. Karl Malden
15. Amy Winehouse
16. Osama bin Laden
17. Barrack Obama
18. Eddie Fisher
19. Roger Clemens (Hung up)
20. Eunice Shriver
21. Billy Graham
22. Hugh Hefner
23. Harry Morgan
24. Ernest Borgnine
25. John Wooden
26. Mary Kate Olsen
27. Pope Benedict
28. Wilford Brimley
29. Les Paul
30. 50¢ - Curtis Jackson
31. Joe Torre
32. Sid Caesar
33. Robert “Sheets” Byrd
34. Perez Musharraf
35. Mickey Rooney
36. Charleton Heston
37. Bill Belichick
38. Andy Rooney
39. Hal Holbrook
40. Jan Michael Vincent
41. Studds Turkel
42. Dick Clark
43. Artie Lange
44. Liza Minnelli
45. Jerry Lewis
46. Maggie Thatcher
47. Ted Kennedy
48. Art Linkletter
49. Charles Manson
50. Milt Schmidt
51. The Fonz - Henry Winkler
52. George Steinbrenner
53. Bea Arthur
54. Betty White
55. Olivia DeHavilland
56. Cheetah
Thanks for keeping track of the death pool, Calvin!
to all: Howie show ping, also a column below.
You’re Sal, and you’re fit to be tied
By Howie Carr | Friday, March 28, 2008 | http://www.bostonherald.com
You’re Sal DiMasi, and you’re fit to be tied You’re House Speaker Sal DiMasi , and this is what you understand about yesterday’s front-page story in The New York Times [NYT].
It’s not about you,; it’s not even about Deval Patrick, that no-good dime-dropping bleepity-bleep. It’s about Barack Obama, and whether or not Massachusetts’ fading enthusiasm for hope, opportunity and moonbat-ism could be a national model for an Obama administration.
You’re Sal DiMasi , and you get that. This whole national infatuation with the black candidate is like the romance Massachusetts endured in 2006. And here in Boston, it’s following the same pattern of a romance. First discovery, then infatuation, then familiarity and, finally, contempt.
Like the contempt you have for Deval.
But still, why was the story about Deval on the front page? Above the fold? This is the first time anything political in Boston involving the North End has been on the Times’ front page since Joey Prevost Anzalone’s $1 townhouse back in 1983. When Mayor Kevin White was running around the Parkman House waving the paper around and yelling, “What are they thinkin’ in the Kremlin when they read this? The Times puts a story on Page One - about a house! In Boston! Mother o’ God!”
You’re Sal DiMasi, and all the news that’s fit to print is that you “embrace old-school ways of doing business.” On Hanover Street, they spell that H-A-C-K.
You’re Sal DiMasi, and you understand how these things work. Deval is incompetent, but no one, least of all The New York Times, can admit that, for the obvious reason that - well, you know. So they need a villain. And you, Sal DiMasi, are white, middle-aged and ethnic. If only you were a little shorter.
They did everything but call you the Joe Bruno of Boston.
You’re Sal DiMasi, and in all the papers you have “henchmen,” while Deval has “aides.” He goes on “trade missions,” you take “junkets.” The money that Deval “appropriates,” you “funnel.”
Every morning a new drive-by shooting in the newspapers,; thank God they’re using BB guns so far. Golfing dates, film festivals - empanel a grand jury already, we got a crime wave here.
You’re Sal DiMasi, and you know which of Deval’s coatholders is behind all this, and you will deal with Doug Rubin in your own good time.
But you understand the context here. When most people in Massachusetts read the word “Speaker”,” they think “felon.”
Which is only to be expected, because your immediate predecessor as speaker, Tommy Taxes Finneran, is a convicted felon. And his immediate predecessor, Good Time Charlie Flaherty , is likewise a convicted felon.
You’re Sal DiMasi , and you’d just as soon keep this fight local. You’ve got enough headaches with your own seething membership to deal with - starting with all of Felon Finneran’s minions that you demoted, led by Jolly John Rogers.
You don’t want Finneran to get control of the House again after you’re gone, but your crew is running short on talent - Ron Mariano, Petro. You don’t need tough guys, you need intelligent tough guys.
So The New York Times thinks it’s “too soon to predict whether Mr. Patrick will ascend beyond state politics, as so many other Massachusetts lawmakers have done.”
Ascend? Surely they meant to say, “tried to ascend, but failed miserably.” Ted Kennedy 1980, Mike Dukakis, 1988, Paul Tsongas 1992, John Kerry 2004, Mitt Romney 2008.
Massachusetts - mother of failed presidential candidates.
You’re Sal DiMasi, and the good news is, today they’ll be wrapping fish with yesterday’s front-page story. And you won’t be back on Page One - at least as long as you don’t buy any $1 townhouses on Unity Court anytime soon.
Article URL: http://www.bostonherald.com/news/opinion/columnists/view.bg?articleid=1083373