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My son was diagnosed as PDD-NOS at three. He is now thirteen. It has been difficult road with his needs requiring a very large degree of attention from both of his parents. There have been many times when we feared that he would not have a full life of education, work, friends, marriage, and achievement. His differences made it difficult for him to develop friendships. It also made school work an incredible ordeal.

This past year marks something of a turning point. He has good friends, is now an A student, and seems happy with himself. For the past five years we have had to spend two or more hours a night working with him in order for him to complete his homework. He would often take four or five hours to complete his work. At long last he is able to do his work largely on his own, and now generally without tears and rage.

He is still different, but perhaps in a way that he will be able to shape to his advantage. For instance, he tends to immerse himself in things he is interested in to a very unusual degree. This obsessive attention could prove useful in a world that values specialists.

The most important factors in his development seem to have been our finding the right school and therapist. We tried several schools before finding one that worked well for him. He has a two hour daily commute, but it is worth it. We also tried several therapist before finding the one that worked well for him. She is not an MD and is quite quirky, but has worked wonders. This is the first year that he has not needed have a therapist.

We have used medications on and off but avoid them whenever possible. The drugs seem to have a big impact at first but their helpful effects seem to rapidly tail off. They do have emotional side effects. Still there have been times when our son has requested to return to his "focus medicine". A mix of over the counter items such as vitamins seem to be helpful as well.

The key resource has been what we call the mommy network. It is very important to talk with the mothers of other PDD children. They know the drugs, the schools and the therapists. Some of their children might even befriend yours. Our son became painfully aware of his differences when he was a few years older than yours. Having peers helped him a good deal. Don't be overly impressed with the instructions issued by professionals. They have their own interests and opinions in play.