[fabian]

ok, good point...but my point that the scriptures teach us to overcome our lower, sexual natures still holds. We are supposed to need sex less and less, not more and more. That much is evident to anyone who is on the spiritual path.

[Anitius Severinus Boethius]

I don’t think that is true within a marriage. Within a marriage it is designed that sexual intimacy is what helps us blend from two people into one person. The Song of Songs is explicit in it’s praise of physical love between a man and wife.

While sex should not be what we strive for to make a good marriage, in a good marriage both partners will often strive for sex as an expression of love and joy for each other. Self-control and indulgence is switched around at the point of marriage. To engage before is indulgent, to abstain after is indulgent.