“You got any turd tampers here?”
“What?”
“Ya know. Homo, rump rangers, turd burglars”
“Uhhh..”
“Cause they like to come on to me. I guess it is my virileness. It causes me a lot of problems in rest areas. I go to rest areas a lot to meet women. I sit in the parking lot waiting. Next thing ya know, I’m being sexually assaulted by a fairy. I been arrested 18 times just cause a my virileness. Completely innocent on my part. It’s my natural male aura”.