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Thanks for the clarification, buddy. I'll just comment on the following sentence instead. Add a God who is also free to act outside of physical determinism and who you can have a relationship with and the world is a magical place where things happen, and these things have meaning and consequence. What does there being a God or not make the sunrise, sunset, the smell in the desert after a good rain, or great time spent with friends or family any more beautiful? It would be only in your mind that I could not appreciate the beautiful things of this world as well as you could. As I've said, I have believed in this stuff before, and looking back I can't rationalize the way I behaved except "it was how I was taught."