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Some Date! (Highschool/College Scene: No Date, No Dance, Just Hanging Out and Hooking Up?)
Wall Street Journal ^ | November 1, 2007 | Jeff Zaslow

Posted on 11/17/2007 4:53:59 PM PST by Mrs. Don-o

Last month, a boy asked my 16-year-old daughter to his school's homecoming dance. She agreed to go, bought a new dress and made a hairdresser appointment.

The boy never bought tickets to the dance. Neither did his friends. They decided that attending homecoming wouldn't be cool, and instead planned to just dress up that night, go out for dinner and then hang out with their dates at someone's house.

My daughter was disappointed, as were her girlfriends. They would have loved to have been taken to the dance, to show off their dresses, to see and be seen.

At 6 p.m. on the night of the boycotted dance, about a dozen of these girls and their dates gathered in one boy's backyard so a mob of parents could photograph them. I found it dispiriting. My heart went out to those girls -- all dressed up with no place to go. Couldn't we, as parents, have demanded that the boys take our daughters to the dance? Why did we stand there, clicking our digital cameras, saying nothing?

I live in suburban Detroit, but this phenomenon is playing out elsewhere in the country, too -- a telling example of the indifference with which young people today view dating, chivalry and romance.

Studies, of course, show more young people skipping romantic relationships in favor of "hooking up." As teens socialize in packs, forgo one-on-one dating and trade sex nonchalantly, it is no stretch to find that boys are asking girls to homecoming and not bothering to take them there. But with so many young people ignoring once-sacrosanct dating rites, how can we respond?

(Excerpt) Read more at online.wsj.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society
KEYWORDS: dating; hookingup; hookup; nofriendship; nofun
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To: Candor7

As I said before, sexual development and preparedness for life responsibilities are two completely different things. Just because you can make a baby doesn’t mean you are prepared to raise it, and that goes for women as well as men. Look at how many grandmothers are raising their grandchildren by their daughters!


121 posted on 11/18/2007 11:43:02 AM PST by LongTimeMILurker
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To: Lizavetta

As far as reunions go, I have found that if you treat these people with respect, and are always nice to them, they usually come around by the next reunion. I am modestly successful and that makes it a little easier for all of us. I’ve got the young ladies who rejected me in high school totally regretting that they never dated me. That is the best type of revenge anyone can hope for. There are a few people who will never change, but not many.


122 posted on 11/18/2007 11:55:09 AM PST by LongTimeMILurker
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To: AmericanInTokyo
Come round to my daughter's college - Davidson near Charlotte NC - and you will be VERY pleasantly surprised.

A nice, neatly groomed and dressed, well-behaved bunch of courteous, intelligent young men and women.

They aren't ALL gone to the dogs . . . .

123 posted on 11/18/2007 12:10:45 PM PST by AnAmericanMother ((Ministrix of Ye Chase, TTGC Ladies' Auxiliary (recess appointment)))
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To: Mrs. Don-o
It's an old-line Atlanta private Christian school - it was originally Presbyterian but is now nondenominational Christian. Very strong academically, excellent music and theater programs. Unfortunately it's not cheap :-( but it was worth it.

The public schools are so bad in Atlanta that everybody who can even arguably afford it sends their kids to private school if they don't home-school -- and all the private schools are expensive, the denominational schools are about 30% cheaper, but the old established private schools are within 1,000 or so of each other. So they've got you over a barrel . . . .

Daughter is third generation in our family to graduate from there. She was class of '06, I was class of '73, and my mom was class of '43.

124 posted on 11/18/2007 12:18:34 PM PST by AnAmericanMother ((Ministrix of Ye Chase, TTGC Ladies' Auxiliary (recess appointment)))
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To: lafroste

Suburban Atlanta, GA.


125 posted on 11/18/2007 12:22:06 PM PST by AnAmericanMother ((Ministrix of Ye Chase, TTGC Ladies' Auxiliary (recess appointment)))
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To: Age of Reason
The other thing I've noticed, is that some women now drive as agressively and obnoxiously as some men.

I don't know if this is a man / woman thing as much as it's a stupidity / inconsiderate thing. Most bad drivers are either doing something stupid or are simply inconsiderate of others that have to share the road with them.
126 posted on 11/18/2007 2:05:10 PM PST by JamesP81 ("I am against "zero tolerance" policies. It is a crutch for idiots." --FReeper Tenacious 1)
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To: AnAmericanMother

glad to hear that!!


127 posted on 11/18/2007 3:44:30 PM PST by AmericanInTokyo (AmericanInTokyo; Count THIS Freeper as solidly behind DUNCAN HUNTER 2008!!!)
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To: Mrs. Don-o

After Iran, we take Detroit ...


128 posted on 11/18/2007 3:47:37 PM PST by Scythian
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To: AmericanInTokyo
Not to say there aren't some frat types who drink more than is good for them . . . but by and large I was very pleasantly surprised by the tone of the place! Food is amazingly good, too . . . certainly a lot better than it was when I was in school.

I tend to sneak around semi-incognito in places where parents usually don't go . . . daughter and I spent some time when we were investigating schools just hanging out in the student centers, wandering through the libraries and sitting on benches outside classrooms. Amazing how you can get a feel for a place doing your best "fly on the wall" imitation . . . .

Probably you will get a quieter and more stable community in a small college like this one than in a large state university.

129 posted on 11/18/2007 3:50:18 PM PST by AnAmericanMother ((Ministrix of Ye Chase, TTGC Ladies' Auxiliary (recess appointment)))
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To: Mrs. Don-o

It’s true. Sometimes called ‘friends with benefits’.


130 posted on 11/18/2007 4:19:07 PM PST by fortunecookie (Communism/socialism has failed millions, it wasn't right for them - and it isn't right for US.)
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To: Mrs. Don-o

Miss Zaslow needs a father. Currently, she doesn’t have one.

This loser shou;d be hanging his head, rather than announcing his loserness to the world.


131 posted on 11/18/2007 4:27:36 PM PST by savedbygrace (SECURE THE BORDERS FIRST (I'M YELLING ON PURPOSE))
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