I understand where you are coming from and I was you many years ago. If you have to go through it, and I pray that you never do, you’re eyes will be forced open by a system that you obviously (and I say that respectfully) have little understanding of.
Keep in mind that I do not agree with the writer’s advice to avoid marriage and family. BUT, in doing it all over again I would BE VERY CHOOSY about the woman.
I’m sorry about your divorce and that your wife is saying bad things about you to the kids. If it is any consolation, I’m a child of divorce, and my mother said bad things about my Dad (nothing too horrible, but she was bitter and inappropriate in the way she talked to us about him). But we stayed loyal to our Dad as well, and every year got smarter and could judge what was what for ourselves.