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To: dit_xi
You have a good point, but I would like to think that forgiveness and unconditional love makes one a better person.

If someone has never given it, they will never receive it. It is possible for a relative to kill any love, if they try hard enough.

Take an example where a parent makes contact an exercise in misery every time a child reaches out to them, and they persist in doing it for decades. Even a saint has limits. After a while, they become strangers, by the choice of one party.

26 posted on 10/08/2007 2:25:07 PM PDT by Gorzaloon (Food imported from China = "Cesspool + Flavor-Straw")
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To: Gorzaloon
You have described my blood family.

No one is required to enable their own abuse.

On my husband’s side, his father ran away to American Samoa to live out his last years in a fog of alcoholism. When this took its inevitable toll, he was incensed that his sons wanted to put him in rehab in the US and refused to communicate with them.

Those who have close, loving families should pause often to give thanks. There are millions of us who never experienced that until we formed our own families as adults. Sometimes I meet as many as one a week and all of them tried at some point to reconcile with manipulative narcissists who simply saw that attempt as yet another weakness to exploit.

29 posted on 10/08/2007 2:39:08 PM PDT by reformedliberal
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