ROFL!! Well done!
I especially like this one:
Do not criticize the performance of the iRon, it will short out the electronics and shock your hand.
The iRon does not function in close proximity to the iRaq unless purchased by someone through one of our new iJihad stores.
The iRon can only be used in the iRan shoe if running away from the iJihad store.
The iRon comes with some great accessories including the iShrimp fishing pole, the iSurrender flag, and the iSpam word processor.
The iRon includes a 100% rebate from the US Government. To submit a rebate, include your original receipt, addressed to iRon. The iRon rebate department may look like it is rejecting your rebate, but don’t worry, you’ll get it through backdoor methods.