Replies

oops, that should say interesting info about HOWIE and the man who got him into radio!

here’s Howie’s column from today’s Herald.

Baby Flats busted in ex-prez lane

by Howie Carr/Boston Herald/ 9/9/07

The hack du jour is former Boston City Council president Michael Flaherty. Key word: former.

Baby Flats, as he’s known to distinguish him from his father, ex-judge and ex-Rep. Michael “Flats” Flaherty, is still a city councilor. And this third-generation payroll patriot pulled a vehicular variation of the old do-you-know-who-I-am routine at the funeral of hero firefighter Paul Cahill in West Roxbury on Thursday.

Baby Flats used an expired city parking placard to park where he shouldn’t have, blocking a Boston Fire Department vehicle for his own convenience. If you or I had pulled such a stunt, we’d have been towed. But then, they don’t know who we are, do they?

Most pols instinctively understand that you have to be on your best behavior at a funeral. At the wake, you arrive either very early or very late, to avoid having to wait in line to pay your respects. At the funeral itself, you sit either at the very front or the very back of the church, the better to be observed in pious reflection by your constituents. Most importantly, you never, ever block anyone else’s car, especially a public-safety vehicle.

I’m sure Baby Flats would have preferred an inconspicuous parking space. But the mourners were SRO and, dammit, he is a Very Important Person. This is a guy whose staff once called the Coast Guard to demand that they hunt him down on a fishing boat.

Don’t you know who he is?

Here’s what happened Thursday. After the emotional funeral Mass for Cahill, his casket was placed in the hearse and the funeral procession departed for the cemetery. Everyone began filing out of the church, including the members of the Boston City Council, most of whom had taken a bus from City Hall so they wouldn’t have to hog a parking space that might otherwise go to a grief-stricken family member, friend or fellow jake.

One of the first people out of the church was Maureen Feeney, who’s the current president of the Boston City Council. Key word: current.

As she walked down the church stairs, a fire captain approached her, and this account is confirmed by two witnesses, although neither Feeney nor Baby Flats returned phone calls Friday.

“Madame President,” the captain said, respectfully. “I have to ask you to please move your car. It’s blocking the arson-squad car.”

Madame President was puzzled. Her car, after all, was parked in the garage at City Hall downtown. She had arrived in Ward 20 on the bus.

“I didn’t bring . . .” she began, before she realized who the real culprit was. “Captain, what kind of car is it that’s blocking you in? Is it an SUV by any chance?”

“A black Mercury Mountaineer,” the captain said. “I thought it was yours. There’s a placard on the dashboard that says ‘City Council President.’ ”

He was right about that. But right under ‘City Council President’ was the number ‘2006.’ Do you care to guess who the council president was last year?

Feeney scanned the crowd streaming out of Holy Name. Down on the sidewalk she spotted Baby Flats.

“Mr. President,” Madame President told him. “Move your car!”

And he quickly slithered away.

The thing about being president of the City Council is that it is the ultimate nothing job, unless the mayor decides to take a powder in the middle of his term, the chances of which in Mumbles’ case are slim, fat and none.

The late Freddy Langone once memorably likened being president of the City Council to being an admiral in the Swiss navy. At least give Feeney credit for understanding the status limitations of her position. That’s why she took the bus. As for Baby Flats, the only thing sadder than trying to cash in on the job of council president is trying to cash in on being the former council president.

Baby Flats, forget about ever asking, “Do you know who I am?”

Repeat after me, “Do you know who I was?”