[Jeff Chandler]

A healthy family is one where the marriage is at the center, not the kids. Just my humble opinion. :-)

Amen! When parents make children (as opposed to the marriage) the center of their lives, it puts a huge burden on the kids, from childhood through adulthood.

You're both close to the truth. There is a time for everything. When children arrive, the focus of the relationship naturally shifts to them because by their very nature they require the attention. But the parents shouldn't substitute the childrens' lives for their own. Part of child rearing is modeling a healthy marriage. And I agree that parents who are emotional parasites of their children do no one any good.

[Abigail Adams]

“And I agree that parents who are emotional parasites of their children do no one any good.”

That’s a great comment! I would be interested to hear examples of this. Do you mean, for example, parents who get an ego boost from bragging about their kids’ sports?