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Best Reality Show Ever... Or So Far... (Debbie Schlusssel Humor Break Alert)
Debbie Schlussel.com ^ | 08/23/2007 | Debbie Schlussel

Posted on 08/23/2007 8:24:15 AM PDT by goldstategop

Like most sane people with a life, I hate reality TV shows. Why should I care about wannabe loser nobody's and what eight of them do together in a house or on an island or in an Australian desert?

But, based on my viewing of the first two episodes of "Anchorwoman" on FOX, last night, I think this show is an exception. Anchorwoman is Lauren Jones, a completely ditzy excessively-siliconed, peroxided former model and WWE wrestler who wants to become a local news anchor. They'd never hire this idiot, but since FOX owns the small-town Texas TV station and wanted to make this TV series, the network gave the local news operation an offer "they couldn't refuse."


News Anchor-Bim Lauren Jones

Jones is so completely annoying and dumb that it's hilarious. She has no edit button and the persona and emotional development of a disobedient 3-year-old. Her less glamorous, real-news colleagues are extremely irked (and jealous) that they work so hard and yet have to put up with this bimbo getting a free ride in without paying dues.

But, hey, that's what local and national news has become these days. It's not about brains. It's about looks and showbiz. Jones would fit right in at FOX News (or MSNBC or CNN Headline News--where a one-time model and NYPD Blues star once got an instant anchor seat--for that matter). It's hilarious when she comes to work in stripper shoes and a shirt so low-cut you can see almost her entire basketball-sized, incongruous "enhancements." Gives newswhore, er . . . newshound, a more definitive meaning.

And JOnes seems to have this odd obsession with "the Jews," in her air-headedly funny comments. Here are a couple that made me both wince and laugh at her:

* When she can't stand walking on a road to gather information for a news story:

Holy cannoli. We eat those in New York. They're Jewish.

Right. Like Knishes and Rugalach are Italian.

* When a superior tells her, "You're way too WASP to get away with that," Jones responds:

WASP? I'm not Jewish.

Man, whoever passed this woman on the high school equivalency test is ripe for a malpractice lawsuit.

I'm sure it will get old. Gawking at train wrecks and auto accidents quickly does. But for now, it's jaw-droppingly entertaining in a jarring way to watch this woman's breathtaking ignorance.

She says she's "half-Katie Couric." That actually might be accurate.


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Culture/Society; Editorial; News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: anchorwoman; debbieschlussel; foxnewschannel; infobabes; itsthelooksstupid; laurenjones; realityshows
Its funny - they're called infobabes but not all of them have smarts. Some of them are hired strictly for looks. Like Fox News Channel's Lauren Jones. Who can't get Jewish cuisine right. Hahahahaha

"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus

1 posted on 08/23/2007 8:24:18 AM PDT by goldstategop
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To: goldstategop

{{{She says she’s “half-Katie Couric.}}}

Only above the neck.


2 posted on 08/23/2007 8:30:32 AM PDT by AnnGora (Where do you hail from when it's not raining?)
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To: AnnGora
Yeah - this_thread_is_worthless_without-pics

"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus

3 posted on 08/23/2007 8:34:10 AM PDT by goldstategop (In Memory Of A Dearly Beloved Friend Who Lives In My Heart Forever)
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To: goldstategop
I loved the “smudged out” coworkers who are obviously too full of themselves to have their integrity compromised by being associated with such a show on Fox (aka to them... the Devil).

Though I miss So You Think You Can Dance, this will fill in nicely.

4 posted on 08/23/2007 8:35:18 AM PDT by PfromHoGro (Your DNC- Replacing God with government for 40 years.)
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To: goldstategop

I told my wife this was an insult to journalists everywhere and they would go after her with a vengeance.


5 posted on 08/23/2007 8:44:14 AM PDT by L98Fiero (A fool who'll waste his life, God rest his guts.)
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To: goldstategop

I thought the show was hilarious. The cattiness alone was priceless.


6 posted on 08/23/2007 9:21:02 AM PDT by jdub
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To: jdub

It might be a break super slick anchors that proliferate the news.


7 posted on 08/23/2007 10:12:47 AM PDT by RetSignman (DEMSM: "If you tell a big enough lie, frequently enough, it becomes the truth")
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