Good Lord.
Going to the bathroom in that religion is a real test of faith.
You have to say a prayer going in.
You have to decide which way to face.
You have to decide whether to piss squatting down or standing up. That means you gotta examine the soil, make a determination of the moisture content in the soil, and so on.
You have to hold your coffee in your right hand so you can hold with your left.
You have to utter another prayer.
You have to continue hanging onto your coffee with your right hand. Basically...you touch anything at all with that right hand except your styrofoam coffee cup, you are going to hell.
You have to utter another prayer as you leave.
No wonder these people live in the Seventh Century. How the hell can you invent the cotton gin when it takes you all that time and energy just to piss.
I guess living in a constantly dehydrated state in the Middle East where you piss once a day is the only way you could do it without going stark raving mad.
And, what if you REALLY have to go? Those times when you get through the bathroom door, and are fumbing madly with the zipper to your pants, hopping like a lunatic from foot to foot, hoping desperately to get it out and aimed in the generally right direction before you piss yourself?
You gotta say the prayer fast, take the compass reading and turn as you do, shift the cup, unzip with the left hand, look at the soil, figure it out, squat or stand, get it back in and say a prayer all while jumping from foot to foot as if you were standing on hot coals.
MAKES ME GLAD TO BE AN AMERICAN! WE DON’T HAVE TO PISS LIKE EUROSITZPINKLERS OR MULLAHS!
And if you fart it can invalidate your prayers and you have to start the cleansing ritual all over again.
It can be enough to drive you mad enough to hijack a plane and kill thousands of people.
It is institutionalized Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder.
#42 is hilarious....I’m ROFLOL while hopping from one foot to the other, holding onto my coffee cup for dear life with my right hand..