Posted on 06/30/2007 4:30:50 AM PDT by Kaslin
The murder-suicide of professional wrestler Chris Benoit and his wife and child rightly provoked an outpouring of sympathy for the surviving members of Benoit’s family. A few days after Benoit strangled his wife, smothered his 7-year-old son, and hung himself, the World Wrestling Entertainment described the crime as “a terrible tragedy and an unbearable loss.”
But the tragedy is not limited to Benoit’s relatives. The best-case scenario would have been that the murder-suicide was an isolated incident, shielded from the public eye. Unfortunately, as a professional wrestler, Benoit had an audience of millions – many of them young men who watch WWE for a warped lesson in masculinity.
One can hardly blame this audience for believing Benoit was an example of a real man – right up until the moment he killed his wife and child in a steroid-fueled rampage. They don’t have many other examples to compare him to.
Twenty million American children live in a home with only one parent, the vast majority of them mothers. Since one-third of all children are born out of wedlock, many boys will never live under the same roof as an adult male, let alone their own fathers. They aren’t likely to find masculine role models in school, either: the number of male public school teachers is down to 20 percent overall and fewer than 10 percent at the elementary level. Boys eventually learn about manhood from someone – but if not from male relatives and teachers, then who?
With few positive role models to emulate, it should surprise no one that many boys adopt the hyper-masculinity of athletes and rap stars, who demonstrate that misogyny, drug use, violence and reckless sex are the marks of a real man.
The world of professional sports might occasionally offer an athlete who is a positive role model for boys, but a host of others are studies in violence and criminality. Pro athletes have been caught beating up their wives and girlfriends (Phillies pitcher Brett Myers, Nets star Jason Kidd), raping women (the NBA’s Ruben Patterson and boxer Mike Tyson), and committing multiple murders (Benoit as well as infamous wife-killer OJ Simpson). Unfortunately, many boys who watch sports don’t have a man around to teach them that they can become successful athletes without the off-the-court violence.
Perhaps even worse role models for boys are hip-hop stars, who demonstrate all the manly virtues of drug dealers and prison inmates. In the rap industry, it’s a badge of honor to have served time in jail. Rapper Akon opens every song by declaring himself a “convict,” followed by the sound of a cell door slamming shut. (He was also recently investigated for performing lewd acts on a 15-year-old girl onstage.) Rappers “Snoop Dogg” and the aptly named “C-Murder” have both been charged with murder. Rap lyrics normalize violence, including the abuse of women (or, in ghetto patois, “bitches”) as the privilege of successful men. Needless to say, rampant drug use is practically a requirement for hip-hop stardom.
By far the biggest consumers of both industries are young men, many of whom take cues about success from their stars. Boys without fathers are especially susceptible to pernicious influences, in the entertainment industry and elsewhere: they are two and a half times more likely to wind up in jail than boys from intact homes. Unfortunately, the lawless lifestyle of celebrities doesn’t much benefit boys who emulate it.
To be sure, these stars lead glamorous lives. They have the things a lot of normal men want: beautiful women, big houses, fancy cars, talent, and fame. But some of them are monsters behind closed doors, strung out on cocaine or steroids, and violent toward women, children, and other men. And they’re the only examples of masculinity some boys can find.
The real disaster is that many boys don’t have fathers around to teach them that manhood could entail anything positive, such as providing for a family. It’s tragic that Chris Benoit was able to murder his wife and child. It’s also tragic that many American boys considered him a real man.
Ashley Herzog is a junior at Ohio University, studying journalism, and lives in Avon Lake, Ohio.
I bet we have a lot of great men on this site.
“Real Men: Ten Courageous Americans to Know and Admire” by R. Cort Kirkwood
http://www.amazon.com/Real-Men-Courageous-Americans-Admire/dp/1581825633/
"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus
“Where Are the Real Men?”
Try the local Boy Scout troop - there will be plenty of role models.
Getting a boy involved in Scouting is probably the best thing a single mom can do for her son.
This article mentions a handful of cretins in pro sports - but there are a lot of people who play sports. Most keep their noses clean, at least in the public light. Wonder if the rate is higher or lower than the general population.
Want to see something which looks like wrestling and an athlete kids could emulate, try this.
Unfortunately Real Men do not node well in a society obsessed with political correctness.
I also believe giving them a sound faith in God not only provides a moral compass, but sets them off in the right direction.
The jobs that are valued as highly abstract and cerebral, such as computer modeling, economic analysis, design, etc. etc.
So, we build video dioramas — in the form of cable TV shows like ultimate fighter, professional wrestling, worlds most dangerous jobs, etc. etc.
I could name a dozen off the top of my head; they're all over the North Carolina forum (not to mention the Undead Thread :-).
I'll be picking my Scouts up from camp after lunch. The baby's been looking for his brothers all week! (Under the sofa? I guess it's possible!) "Iggle wiggle blaggle Bill?"
This is the real problem, not pro wrestling or rap or some other pop-culture horror. But hardly anyone has the nerve to say it is a problem at all. In fact, the surveys now show that the majority of Americans see nothing wrong with out-of-wedlock parenting. Those who do are denounced as judgmental and hopelessly old-fashioned.
36 PM: Vanax -- 8:07pm -- Wed, Jun 27, 07 pst
Vanax
It's a shame that we lost Chris Benoit, world champion, but we still have G. W. Bush, world dick
135 PM: Vanax -- 8:15pm -- Wed, Jun 27, 07 pst
Vanax
Benoit is condemned for stopping his killing at three while Bush is being ignored for continuing to kill.
They were several in the room who told him he was a idiot for idiolizing someone that killed his wife and and who cowardly killed himself
The last auto mechanic I talked to about earnings made 80,000 dollars a year, working for a dealership in Cleveland. That included some overtime but not much. And it was about five years ago, so he's making more today.
If I had a son who was lackadaisical about school I would not hesitate to encourage him to get the training for a skilled trade that interested him. And then to start his own business when he had learned the ropes. He would develop initiative, self-reliance, and a sense of accomplishment from honest work.
And now, rightfully so, women lament “where are the real men.”
Now mind you, I don't give a #### as this has nothing to do with my life. But this whining for real men in the wake of feminist jihad is beyond pathetic.
To be honest, I’m only 21 and I stopped pandering to the politically correct lobby years ago. If they don’t like me being a man, screw ‘em. I’m scared for my generation. There aren’t enough people who can think for themselves around. It really is the simple things that make it in the end though. Honesty and integrity being high on the list. I shake my head in disgust when I see these stupid wannabe thugs on the street.
As for the Benoit thing. Steroids are an excuse. If you can’t control yourself, you have a big problem. I would guess this goes further than we’ll ever know, at least those of us on the outside looking in.
If I may suggest try looking in rural Alaska, we still have some tough jobs up here in harsh conditions that still pay very well.
All around us.
A REAL MAN? You need look no further than South Carolina. A man named Jim DeMint stood up against a cadre of veteran Senators and a President who were hell bent on abusing power.
When I mentioned auto-mechanic, I was thinking of the guy doing repairs in his garage. That’s quickly becoming a thing of the past.
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