me too, I string them along as long as I can, for example if they are a mortgage broker I tell them I was just thinking about a refi on my $5 million mansion, and on and on and on for ten or fifteen minutes, then a good cussing-out when it sounds like they are geting wise to me.
I put them on hold.
There was a hilarious recording circulating several months ago—some guy who enjoys tormenting telemarketers picked up the phone and pretended to be a police detective investigating a murder, and getting the telemarketer involved and ultimately terrified as the “detective” could be heard giving orders for the police to go interrogate him about being the imaginary victim’s gay lover. I’m laughing just thinking about it. Does anyone have the link? Lord, it was funny, and I’ll bet that telemarketer never called anybody again.
“these days he tries to waste as much of a telemarketer’s time as possible.’
My feelings on the efficacy of this can best be expressed in a joke from long ago.
Bob asked Neil to watch over his herd of hogs while Bob was in town. Bob said, “If they get thirsty, you can take them down to the river for a drink.”
“Okay,” said Neil.
When Bob came back later in the day, he found a sweaty, red-faced Neil staggering out of the pig pen carrying a big boar hog.
Neil asked, “What are you doing, Bob?”
“I’m taking the hog down to the river to get a drink, like you said.”
“Well, you could just drive the whole herd down to the river, rather than carrying each pig by itself. Doesn’t it take an awful long time to water the hogs that way?”
“Sure, it takes a long time,” said Bob. “But what’s time to a pig?”
I asked what did he mean. He asked what year I bought my house. I explained that I lived in a rented apartment.
The telemarketer got really upset for some reason, and hung up.