[AmericanInTokyo]

You have said it very well. You have noticed a phenomenon which is deeply embedded...and causes many of our failures in US foreign and military policy, IMHO. We deal from good faith, because we adhere to honor and truth, and we project that upon others who do not necessarily have that cultural (and hence geo-political) physiology...and we are terribly naive in our aberrated expectations as a result.

You can almost here them in Foggy Bottom in their Jos A Banks suits, wireframe glasses steaming over their Starbucks this morning, "But...but...but....WE HAD A DEAL!!"

[familyop]

Yes...exactly.

[familyop]

This might clarify what I was saying for other readers.

I’ve learned that when presenting new information to other people, that we must stop thinking about ourself. We must concentrate on the information being delivered and watch for the levels of attention, understanding and intentions of the audience receiving the information. In order to use these methods, we must be capable of a sort of attitude of non-existence—that is, an assumption that only the information and the other peoples’ reactions and desire to receive and agree with the information.

It works the same the other way around—when we are receiving information from the other person. Of course, it is more difficult to receive and understand new information than to deliver it.

And most importantly, the receiver of information must be motivated to receive it.

...not a way that many Baby Boomers (including myself) are very accomplished in.