Nice little tap dance there. Let's see, you want a response but not a war. What do you suggest, a diplomatic courier? FGS we're already taking out their leadership in Iraq and their top officers are defecting like crazy, what more response do you want? Plug up their sewers?
What's your problem, buddy? Are you even coherent?
When a foreign army attacks our army we should respond. That doesn't mean full scale war, but it does mean sending a message. The president should have publically announced the attack and immediately order a few cruise missiles into the Iranian army installation across the border from this incident. That will send a message the Iranians (and the American people) will understand. If you disagree with that then you and I simply disagree on tactics.
You need to go take a long walk. Clear your mind and drop the childish attitude.