knowing some of my fellow parents at these schools, they are at least half the problem. the school bends over backwards to discourage underage drinking at dances, proms etc. Parents are the ones presiding over the parties where alcohol is served.
Doing the right thing isn't easy. Sometimes, things come out that are well intended but a bit over the top. That's all that I'm cautioning against.
I am sitting here at home, presiding over the start of a regular Friday night teenage party at my house, hosted by my son. We get anywhere from three to ten teenagers. They do what kids do until about 11 p.m. or so, and generally make a mess of the place. I sit right here at the PC, making smart remarks and keeping a loose eye on them. They don't mind me and I don't mind them until it comes time to clean up :) (And we're working on that.) But we have an understanding and no one gets out of hand. It's an experience for me and they don't seem to mind having an old fart hanging out nearby. I will admit that they can make me blush at times. At least I know where my children are, eh?