What's not to hate about this article?
Humans get crabs (Ugh. Don't remind me. Not that I'm saying...)
Gorillas get crabs too. (Brightens the day)
People got crabs from gorillas (oh, great), either by:
(a) having sex with gorillas (sounds like a bad idea. Sounds like something not human-initiated. Sounds like the edited out parts of Marlin Perkins. Makes one wonder if there's some other motivation to those crazed gorilla worshippers who hang out in jungles to be with the gorilla bands they study.)
(b) eating dead gorillas. Or, more specifically, eating the parts of dead gorillas that had pubic hair, so they could get public lice. Prehistoric man discovers the hot dog. Perfect. (well, you can just ROCK me to sleep tonight after THAT image)>
(c) Hanging out in abandoned gorilla nests. I suppose that's not so bad, except for the fact that, among all the OTHER things we now have to worry about in the world, getting CRABS from going camping is now on the list. Swell.
Interestingly, they didn't mention a fourth and rather possible scenario...
(d) young male human hunters having sex with DEAD gorillas (lose your lunch yet?)
So, there's a perfectly unlovely set of mental images.
The only saving grace is that at least the article didn't come with any pictures...although my little finger tells me that there's a particular picture coming along now that I've said that, and the juxtaposition of that picture with the idea of crabs will make me - or any other healthy, normal person - vomit, so please don't...
"and the juxtaposition of that picture with the idea of crabs will make me - or any other healthy, normal person - vomit, so please don't..."
Dead, this means YOU.