There are no 'perfect' children. Some challenges may be more visible or frightening than others.
A SIL of mine did every Search-and-destroy test on her fetuses that the doctors could provide. As her children have grown, one isn't as tall as desired, one freckles more than is fashionable, all 3 drink like fish. What did she gain?
I think she lost the joy and wonder of meeting and falling in love with new souls who had much to teach her. Instead, she raised survivors, who all are in search of love.
I had 2 'suspicious' pregnancies. I declined all tests, content to do my best to rise to the challenges that life presents... All four of my children have traits and personalities I never could have imagined. I fall in love with them over and over again.
The biggest gift they have given me (besides much love) is endless humility. Human beings are unfathomable! :-)
Poor kids will never be good enough. No wonder they drink. There's nothing so sad as a child whose own parents don't love him or her as they are. Nothing is so devestating to a child.