Here's the winning song. http://powerlineblog.com/archives/016537.php
The contest rules called for submissions by email. It called for submission of lyrics. They had to be submitted through the internal email on the Bennett website. One of the judges admitted - "I think Ron's terrific performance may have have put him over the top with the contest judges." So we had a lyrics contest that apparently was judged based on an actual performance. If the rules provided for MP3s in addition to lyrics, I would have gotten some done. The decision of the judges was final. That's fine, but he certainly needs to do a contest next time that follows the rules.
It really is good. Of course it seriously helps to have the recording and not just lyrics!! Whoopsie on the rules. I am sure one of yours was the runner up, no? Wonder who else's they liked!
I should have tried to sing mine, LOL. Sandy Burglar karaoke. I don't know if I could get that voice -- could I stuff my cheeks with cotton like Marlon Brando in the Godfather?
Oh, well. FWIW, here was my submission:
If I Only Had the Nerve
***
Yeah it's sad, believe me Mista'
When a man's a Clintonista
Without the vim and verve
But I could show my slickness
And be Willy's clever witness
If I only had the nerve
The archives held the mystery
For ME rewriting history
A fate I well deserved...
And my plan, it was hatching
While my socks were busy scratching
Then I finally got the nerve!
Picture me, a trailer tire
Some papers down below
"Wherefore art thou, Osama-o"
We never knew... did you?
***
Bush would soon be just a nuffin'
My pants all full of stuffin'
*His* head all full of toof'
He could stay young and chipper
and be worthy of the Gipper
but he'll never have the proof...
I'd unravel every missive
Declassify with scissors
A ding-a-derry doo...
And a mere dismeanor
Made my youth look kind of cleaner
And I owe it all to ME.
Oh I could tell you why
Kuwait is on the shore
Why Bin Laden doesn't write us any more..
But do I tell? Oh well..
***
I'm afraid there's no denial
I had a *dandy* trial
The sentence was absurd
'Cause I'm slick as a whistle
(Like the boy who shoots the missiles?
Cause his missus had a pistol?)
Cause his missus is a lady who will serve....
And I'm sure to get a fine, a home, a pardon,
Da Nerve!
I'm calling for a NEW song parody contest in which the rules about lyrics only are FOLLOWED.