Not at all, dipstick.
"Quit chasing my heels like an oft-kicked puppy."
You have round heels, easy to chase since you usually tip over early in the race.
"Follow forum rules or you might get Travised."
Gee, you must have been appointed Admin Mod or something. How else to explain your sudden interest in the forum rules? Hint: you might try following them yourself.
You really are fixated on Travis. If you want to make an appointment with him, I'll try to arrange it...
PRND21, Do you smuggle drugs across the border?