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Working mothers 'damage their child's health'
Telegraph ^ | 12/30/06 | Graeme Paton

Posted on 12/30/2006 4:39:20 PM PST by bruinbirdman

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To: Valpal1

Yep.


41 posted on 12/30/2006 6:41:00 PM PST by RKV ( He who has the guns, makes the rules.)
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To: Humidston

I think its great that you could be a stay home mother. I believe that is the best way. I was merely pointing out that in some cases it simply cannot be done.


42 posted on 12/30/2006 6:41:28 PM PST by sgtbono2002 (The fourth estate is a fifth column.)
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To: SALChamps03

I just read your homepage. How long have you been a member of the NEA?


43 posted on 12/30/2006 6:42:25 PM PST by Humidston
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To: rocksblues

It's good that you recognize the bum at least. Sometimes "family" will take advantage of soft relatives who might be naive.

I'm sure you only want to help your daughter out, it's just a shame that the bum gets to benefit.


44 posted on 12/30/2006 6:46:40 PM PST by SteveMcKing
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To: RKV

As a mom, I'd have to agree with you on this one. I'll NEVER understand a mother who goes back to work soon after having a child. I can't help but wonder why they even bothered to have one in the first place. I would AT LEAST stay home the first three years, but the longer you wait, the better, in my opinion. The children I know who are in preschool DO tend to act out and get sick a lot. Not to mention that it's horrifying to me to put a complete stranger in charge of a child at such a tender age. It's much too important of a job to trust it to someone you don't even know.


45 posted on 12/30/2006 6:49:16 PM PST by derllak
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To: sgtbono2002

And I understand how hard that is today for people who are starting a family. Really all I'm trying to do is say the joy of seeing my adult children turn out well trumped all other issues in my past.

Unfortunately, too many women are forced to provide and that's a real heartbreaker for the kids IMHO.


46 posted on 12/30/2006 6:54:15 PM PST by Humidston
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To: SteveMcKing

Steve, you won't get me to disagree. Personally, I suggest we end government based schooling at all levels and let people pay for what they get. Period.


47 posted on 12/30/2006 6:57:00 PM PST by RKV ( He who has the guns, makes the rules.)
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To: All

I don't know if I buy it. It would be wonderful if all mothers could stay home, but it isn't a reality. I think a good mom will make a difference if she stays home or works.

My mom worked and my siblings and I all have good jobs and we are very close to our parents. My husband's mom stayed home and had 6 kids. 2 of them are completely disfunctional and can't hold a job. One lives far away and does not ever want to come back to visit. I hate going over there for the holidays.

My point - just because you stay home with your kids doesn't make you a good parent.


48 posted on 12/30/2006 6:58:35 PM PST by birddog
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To: Valpal1

I cannot think of any act more antithetical to the maternal instinct than deliberately abandoning one's own young child, even if only for a few hours.


49 posted on 12/30/2006 6:59:48 PM PST by Mr J (All IMHO.)
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To: Liberty Wins

I'm making a sweeping indictment. Spend time with your child (4 years old and younger) and you will be richly rewarded. Pawn off the responsibility to others and take what you get. Sorry to be cold, but those are the facts as I see them. Some here may not like it. Tough.


50 posted on 12/30/2006 7:00:27 PM PST by RKV ( He who has the guns, makes the rules.)
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To: birddog

Point made, but you have to start with a level of committment and a willingness to spend the time required. That doesn't guarantee the result, but your odds go up - significantly. And I don't know about you, but I play the odds.


51 posted on 12/30/2006 7:02:17 PM PST by RKV ( He who has the guns, makes the rules.)
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To: RKV
If you and your spouse can't afford to spend (at least) the first five years with your child, you can't afford to have a child.

Perhaps. But the societies were only those people have children who are able to afford it, will die out.

52 posted on 12/30/2006 7:03:47 PM PST by A. Pole (Hugo Chavez: "Huele a azufre, pero Dios está con nosotros")
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To: bruinbirdman

I wish the experts were wrong. It would make me feel better if children did great in daycare, because there are a huge number of single moms out there who are trapped on the working treadmill, trying to provide a living for themselves and their kids and not doing a very good job of it.

Please don't condemn me for saying this but things WERE better when there were very few single moms. Divorce and single women having babies are creating a large underclass of dysfunctional kids. This is something the studies are showing us bigtime, and we'd better wake up to it.


53 posted on 12/30/2006 7:06:42 PM PST by Liberty Wins (Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of all who threaten it.)
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To: RKV

You'd be surprised.


54 posted on 12/30/2006 7:18:35 PM PST by FourPeas (The right thing to do never requires any subterfuge, it is always simple and direct. Calvin Coolidge)
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To: RKV

My daughter and son in law have a beautiful baby daughter. They both work full time, and are finishing their education, part time. I babysit when I can, however, I'm a working Grandma.

At times they have to use daycare.

I defy you to find a toddler more loved, cherished, and happy. She is our gift from God.

They didn't plan the pregnancy, were using precautions, but my granddaughter was conceived.

Sometimes they have no other choice other than use daycare.

Would you rather they took another route, and heaven forbid, not have this precious baby?

Perhaps you should realize that not every siutation is perfect, and the main thing is that a child is loved and cherished.


55 posted on 12/30/2006 7:20:13 PM PST by LisaMalia (God Bless President Bush and our Troops....and GO BUCKEYES!....)
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To: DennisR

there are alot of other harmful factors (to the children)that come about when moms work full time. Think about how hard it was in the past for a pediophile to breach a neighborhood when it was chocked full of stay at home moms who knew each other and everyones children. They'd have spied a stranger a mile away and been chasing them off in a heartbeat!


56 posted on 12/30/2006 7:34:19 PM PST by annelizly
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To: rocksblues
My daughter is married to a bum. I cannot afford to support them. She works 3 days a week. I and my wife watch the 2 year old terror. Luckily I was allowed to retire early. Still I wish that she would leave the bum and move back in with us!

I have to say that I agree with you and also sympathize with you. I have been there, doing that now. Our daughter was in a similar situation and I was the primary caretaker of her twins until they were 3 then they went to an excellent pre-school, part-time. They are now 1st graders and doing pretty well.

My daughter and the twins moved in with us about 18 months ago and she filed for divorce. We are all glad that she is divorced and she is finally healing from the abuse she suffered from her insane husband. Her boys always considered our house their house, too, so it wasn't much of an adjustment FOR THEM. We love having them here and will be devastated if/when my daughter gets her own place.

That being said, let me assure you that it is extremely difficult adjusting to having a grown daughter and 2 children move in with you on a permanent basis. Sometimes it is pure delight and other times it seems like pure Hell.

My daughter is working part-time in a low paying job in order to be with her sons as much as possible. My husband and I both encouraged her to do this even though this causes us to sacrifice money for our retirement. We feel like the welfare of our daughter and grandchildren are the most important thing right now. We can only keep this up a few more years or our retirement will not be as comfortable as we had expected.

So be careful what you wish for.

P.S. I would still take them in a thousand times over rather than have her stay with that monster she married.

57 posted on 12/30/2006 7:36:25 PM PST by jamaly (I evacuate early and often!)
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To: lastchance; Old Professer
So I refuse to fall for the claim that Pre K is needed to advance our children's place in the world.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

PreK will advance the power of the NEA. Once it gets its will and Pre-k is established throughout the land. The NEA will then lobby of toddler schools.

We will eventually see NEA workers waiting outside delivery room doors. They will snatch the newborn and take him off to NEA baby raising "schools". ( I am completely serious.)

Finally, the longer children are in government schools the dumber they get. In my opinion formal school should "wait until eight". If we did this we would see far less dyslexia. ( my opinion)
58 posted on 12/30/2006 7:46:27 PM PST by wintertime (Good ideas win! Why? Because people are not stupid)
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To: bruinbirdman

I think I would rate this story as the biggest load of manure I've seen in a long time.


59 posted on 12/30/2006 7:49:26 PM PST by org.whodat (Never let the facts get in the way of a good assumption.)
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To: wintertime
If we did this we would see far less dyslexia. ( my opinion)

Actually, you might be exactly right on the money there. I've seen 3 studies about forcing kids to learn to read early and how it can be damaging to developing brains. The better and more natural way is to give the kid massive amounts of exposure to text- and I mean thousands of hours- and then provide explicit instruction to address the areas that kids did not pick up on their own. But what to do when parents refuse to read to their kids because they are tired or busy? I scratch my head on that one daily. Of the 6 kids I have in my reading class, I think 4 of them would probably not be there if they had received the early ed instruction. And, I don't mean early ed by a pre-k teacher, but by a loving mom or dad holding him/her and showing by their actions that literacy is important and YOU are important.

If you would like I can see if I can find a link to one of those studies, I think it's still on line. It was put out by UVA in connection with one of my masters classes -- it might still be linkable. Very interesting.

60 posted on 12/30/2006 7:54:16 PM PST by SoftballMominVA
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