That reminds me of the time I accidently bit myself in the ear. How did I do that you ask?....Well I was standing on a chair at the time.
I used to be so mean that I had to hold a gun on myself while shaving to keep from cutting my own throat.
Your joke brings to mind a true story. Not long after I met my 22-year old brother-in-law, he asked if I would like to make a little wager. I told him I wasn't much of a betting man. He bet me that he could bite his own ear. I put down my dollar, wondering what the catch was. Then he pulled out from his mouth a full set of upper and lower false teech and clamped them on his ear! Best entertainment a dollar ever bought me! He had lost all of his teeth at 18 due to a rare gum disease. This little ruse paid for all his drinks at the bars.