ROFL!
You have my sympathies.
Ohio's a weird state. We're SLIGHTLY GOP overall...this year perhaps an exception. We have NE Ohio, where I live, that is very much like Michigan or New England politically, but more socially conservative than New England. Southeast Ohio is socially conservative but has that West Virginia economic outlook...so sometimes goes GOP for Presidential elections but goes 50/50 otherwise. Central and West-central Ohio is mostly VERY conservative outside of the city of Columbus, very Midwestern much like Indiana. Southwest Ohio is similar but almost more "southern" in attitude. Northwest Ohio is also more like Michigan in Toledo city but the rest fits in with rural West Central Ohio, even most Toledo suburbs are rather conservative.