I'm so sorry about your nephew. :( May God rest his soul. You have every right to be angry, and I don't blame you one bit. I do understand where she is coming from, though. It must be a living hell to have loved ones over there whenever this kind of news comes out. My prayers go out for involved.
I've had a few privates with armymarinemom, she is like every other mom with a child over there. Scared to death.
Bless her heart.