With a last name like Alter, and a good Christian name like Jonathan, he also probably hates his own name.
He's just a alterBOY carrying water for he RATS he must have been molested by a priest, there must be some reason for the hate./s The name Alter gives meaning to the need for ALTERnative media and why we should all find ALTERnate sources for our news.
This is fun. We should start a contest.